PDA

View Full Version : So scared :(



AdoreMyDogs
02-03-2007, 09:38 AM
I am so scared. I'm 36 weeks pregnant and my baby girl has still not turned into the birthing position. She's breach (or breech, however it's spelled). She tried a few weeks ago while I was at work and it was 1.5 hours of pain, but she never turned. She may be too big, im not sure.

I wish I wasn't so scared. I know c-sections are routine and safe, but I'm just terrified. I've done everything in my power to get her to turn, I lay on the sofa with pillows under my bottom so my pelvis is elevated, and play music for her down low so she might turn to hear it better. I'm not afraid of natural birth at all, but I'm just utterly terrified of getting a c-section. I wish I could lose this fear so I could enjoy the upcoming event but I just can't stop worrying about it.

Not sure what anyone can do here to help, but this is mostly just a vent I guess. I keep asking various people how they recovered from c-sections...some people tell me that it was a HORRIBLE recovery, and that I'll want to kill the first person who makes me laugh, others tell me (when they see the fear welling up in my eyes perhaps) tell me it wasn't too bad. I really just wish she would have just turned, but I guess there's a reason for everything. There is still a slight chance that she'll turn, but she's already tried and failed and she's quite a bit bigger now then when she last tried.

I'm just scared. I always imagined myself trying even natural without epidural, now I am skipping the labor all together and I am just so upset about it. I wanted to experience labor. I know it sounds weird to those of you who have been threw it, but even though it's painful, it's so beautiful. I knew I could have done it. I was so looking forward to it througout my pregnancy. Never in a million years would I have imagined having to skip the labor all together and never get to experience it. I don't know why I'm so scared and dissapointed. :(

Karen
02-03-2007, 09:46 AM
Now, don't be scared. Millions of women have had c-sections, and recovered just fine. It no longer means that future babies cannot be born vaginally, either. My sister had a c-section with her daughter after hours of labor (Emily just got stuck!), and was "kinda uncomfortable" for a couple days, but says it was worth it!

And your baby still has some time, Momma Leslie. Isn't it marvelous that we have the technology now to know the baby's position ahead of time? She may still turn, or not, and there's probably no influence you can have on that. Relax, Momma Leslie, it'll be okay.

Sending you a big hug!!!

PJ's Mom
02-03-2007, 09:56 AM
I had a C-section with one of my twins, and it was a piece of cake! You'll need a little more time to recover, but it's really nothing horrible like some people want you to believe. Looking at your beautiful baby for the first time makes all the pain go away.

If you need one, you're gonna do just fine. Good luck! :)

Pam
02-03-2007, 09:58 AM
Leslie, I was born via c-section and believe me it was many moons ago and long before the medical advances of today. I am none the worse for wear and neither was my mom. :) I know you are concerned. Having your first child can be a fearful thing for sure. The important thing is not so much how we arrive on this planet but rather that we are healthy when we do. Try and think past the birth to all of the joy that awaits you in the years ahead. :)

borzoimom
02-03-2007, 10:07 AM
Honey- please do not worry- my daughter didnt move either until two days before I went into labor- please do not worry. I am sure your doctor has this under control..

moosmom
02-03-2007, 10:39 AM
Leslie,

My daughter was born via C-Section and everything went fine. She still has time to turn. Sometimes they can manipulate her by massage to get her to turn. In any event, you and that sweet little girl will be in my thoughts and prayers.

HUGS

Donna

Sirrahsim
02-03-2007, 10:40 AM
I am with you 100%. I want to share my experience with you even though I did not have the run of the mill c-section.
When time was getting close with Tyler I was very gung-ho and felt ready for the labor experience. I'd read the books, done the visualizations, and gone to the classes. At 41 weeks I still hadn't gone into labor and the reality of surgery started to sink in. The docs gave me the option to try for an induction even though that meant that I would probably not be able to go with an epidural. When I went in for my induction they discovered that my little boy was having trouble. In an instant I went from slightly apprehensive about getting the epidural to terrified because they were rushing me to surgery. In those moments before the surgery I was scared for my little boy but also SO excited because I knew that I didn't have hours to go. With a c-section you have the comfort of knowing that you will see your baby in under an hour.
The surgery itself was relatively easy. I was completely numb from the mid abdomen down and draped so that I couldn't see what they were doing. Once I was all prepped they allowed my husband to come in and sit right by my head. I've heard that there can be a pulling sensation but I really didn't feel anything. Before I even knew what was going on they were lifting my little boy up over the drape and I was looking into the most beautiful (wet, wrinkled, red, and cranky) face that I had ever seen.
My surgery was in the wee hours of the morning on a Friday. By Saturday afternoon they were encouraging me to get up and walk around and by Sunday afternoon I was at home with my sweet little boy. I won't lie and say that it didn't hurt at all, but the pain was not unbearable. You will want underwear that fit you loosely and you will be in your maternity pants for a while longer, but the incision itself will be mostly numb for several months. By the time Tyler was four days old I was up and about. We even went out shopping and out to dinner. The only times I experienced a painful sensation were when I would laugh or sneeze. I quickly discovered that holding an arm across the incision site when I felt a sneeze coming on made a HUGE difference.
My experience was night and day from what I expected, but the c-section wasn't anywhere near as bad as I had heard. Initially I felt guilty because I didn't get to experience labor. At times I even felt like I had somehow cheated but it is just not so!! If you do havea c-section, you are NOT a failure. You did not cheat. If you do end up with a c-section you have to believe that THAT was what was necessary to keep your precious little girl healthy!!
I hope that your little one will turn for you. You still have PLENTY of time for your little one to do some acrobatics in there. Either way you can take comfort in knowing that either way you will end up with a beautiful baby girl :)

I live in Wichita Falls too!! If you need anything at all or just want a shoulder to lean on you can call or PM me. I'll send you a PM with my number.

Reachoutrescue
02-03-2007, 10:43 AM
Oh, Leslie, don't be scared. Your lil' girl still has some time to turn...us girls can be stubborn!! I had two c-sections...I was scared to (I was put completely under, but you won't be), but it was done before I knew it!! You will be okay. If you want to know anything specific about c-sections, just pm me. Chin up mommy...you will do just fine.

sirrahbed
02-03-2007, 10:54 AM
It has been a long time since I worked in L&D but I do know that you still have time for your baby girl to turn naturally. It is also possible for the doctor to manually turn her while you are in early labor - that can as you have experienced be painful but I have seen it done and the moms did just fine. A breech can still be delivered naturally though I don't know if they will allow that - just to be very safe.
I really do understand that strong desire to deliver naturally. Does your doctor know how you feel? If not, talk to her/him OK?

If a c-section is called for, I see you already have moms writing that they also did just fine. Sirrahsim (above) is my daughter and I visited her when Tyler was 4 days old and she acted like nothing had happened. :p I have heard it said that the incison site is sometimes even less painful than the vaginal bruising, tearing etc - that go along with the natural.
You will be just fine. Try to relax and look forward to meeting your new baby :)

lizbud
02-03-2007, 11:53 AM
Leslie, I don't know anything about c-sections as some others here do,
but can tell you that if your Doctor does choose that for you, you won't be
missing much but the pain, hemorrhoids, bruised coccyx, etc, etc. It is not
the beautiful thing we read about, but what comes afterward when you see
your baby for the first time, it's worth WHATEVER you have to do. :)

Whichever way it happens for you, I wish you a happy & healthy baby. :)

cyber-sibes
02-03-2007, 11:53 AM
Hopefully she'll turn on her own. From my experience I have to say it would be better for the baby to arrive by c-section than to go through a vaginal breech birth. I did with my oldest son and it was no picnic, we nearly lost him. Mind you, my doctor KNEW he hadn't turned, and never mentioned the possibility of a c-section. Lots & lots of healthy babies have been born from via c-sections, and that's the most important thing! We'll be waiting to see your precious little one on PT! :D

*Lizbud is correct, you won't miss labor, BELIEVE ME! Most miserable days of my entire life... :rolleyes:

Cataholic
02-03-2007, 01:00 PM
Vaginal births aren't all they are cracked up to be. My recovery, which included a broken bone, kept me down for WAY longer than the recovery from a c-section.

It is all happening for a reason. (Mine must have been to make sure no more children came into the world from me :)

petslover
02-03-2007, 01:30 PM
Hey! I know I talked to you about this by e-mail, but she can possibly still turn around. I know my brother was turned the wrong way for awhile, but he eventually turned back around.. Even if you have a C-section it is perfectly safe. You and your baby will be fine.

Freedom
02-03-2007, 02:25 PM
Just wondering if you have a mid-wife you can speak with about all this. Sometimes they have different types of experiences to the text book MDs.

Rachel
02-03-2007, 02:43 PM
I don't have any personal knowledge, but the information provided above should be quite helpful. Seems like I remember reports of some women even asking for c-sections when they don't necessarily need them, which should be an encouraging factor. Whenever they have a c-section on A Baby Story on TLC I am always amazed at how the mother can be awake through it all and she's not crying out in pain or anything.

Know that we will be praying for a calm and peaceful delivery for you.

luckies4me
02-03-2007, 04:35 PM
I am sure the both of you will be just fine. :) Like others have mentioned, the doctor can manipulate her to turn in early labor, though that doesn't always work. I had my first vaginally and it wasn't a pleasant experience. I had 16 stitches (yes I know, way too many!!!) and was in pain for a great deal afterwards. We almost had to have a c-section and I really wish I would have. Now that I am pregnant with my second I am hoping for a c-section. Labor was way too hard on my body and my son almost died because of it. Due to my baby being so large the doctor thinks I may need one anyway, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed. :)

I have known several women who had c-sections and all did just fine. Keep your chin up. There is still time. The main thing is that your daughter be healthy. :)

tikeyas_mom
02-03-2007, 11:27 PM
im sure you will be fine, and the baby will be too.. my mom had my brother naturally and he was breach as well.. he turned out healthy and happy as a clam :). congrats on the new baby coming soon too!! I cant wait till my first altrasound

shais_mom
02-04-2007, 12:16 AM
hugs on the way Leslie.
and lots of prayers too

anna_66
02-04-2007, 06:53 AM
Leslie you'll be in my thoughts and prayers.

Cincy'sMom
02-04-2007, 08:31 AM
I hope whatever way works out is what is best for both you and baby girl. Lots of prayesr coming your way.

Do you have someone in place to update us when the happy day comes?!?

Kfamr
02-04-2007, 08:44 AM
Sending my thoughts out to you and the baby girl. I'm sure all will be well, hang in there!

AdoreMyDogs
02-04-2007, 11:38 AM
Thanks for the kind words, everyone. I really am scared, but it does help to talk to people who don't frighten me with negative imput. I find I am a bit more at peace when I go into the nursery and look threw all the newly washed onsies and sleepers and toys and the adorable new crib bedding and the pretty bassenett and visualize a beautiful little baby in these adorable things. I find myself going into the nursery often. It really doesn't take the fear away, but it numbs it. It has also helped reading all your nice responses. I've read them over several times and that also numbs my fear. I will take a few pictures of the nursery soon and her take-home outfit. There are a few more things I want for her nursery so it's not as cute as I wanted, but it's still very cute.

Her nursery is in a bug theme. I have always loved bugs and always wanted a bug theme in my future babies' room. The bedding has bees, butterflies, dragonflies and lady bugs all over it, and she has lots of little bug toys, outfits, and rattles and stuff. The stuff that I really wanted were bug decorations for the walls, but they're out of stock and won't be getting more in for 6 weeks or so. The wall color is gorgeous, but it's a little bare in her room without the decorations on the wall, but it'll be ok. Stuff I need is coming before the stuff I want :)

Thanks so much everyone. I really appreciate you all. This is so scary and new to me and it is so helpful to have such wonderful people cheer me on and offer very comforting words. It means so much to me to be able to talk to a group of people, most of which I've never 'met', who don't belittle me for being so scared and don't think it's silly to be scared.

lizbud
02-04-2007, 11:50 AM
I am glad you feel like you want to share feelings here at PT. :)
Your description of the babies' room sounds wonderful to me. Sort of
like a Magic Garden theme. :) I do hope things continue to go well for
you Leslie, and your sweet little one too.

sirrahbed
02-04-2007, 12:04 PM
The nursery sounds adorable and I am also looking forward to posts that tell about the arrival of your little girl. I would love to see the nursery. Our newest grandbaby is Annika who was born to chrangharris. Her nursery is also a bug theme with dragonflies and such. The bedding has a sagey green and rose color on the quilts and wallhangings. Maybe even the same bedding? :) I thinbk the other grandma, persianmom made the hangings from pieces of the matching fabric. If you sew, that might be something that would help you pass some of these final days of waiting?

PS I found a pic of the nursery:
http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid210/pa69e36027a533235d7706f27632e61de/edbac094.jpg

The day is coming soon and you will be in that nursery with a brand new daughter! :) :)

(((HUGS)))

Karen
02-04-2007, 12:25 PM
Oooh, fun, a buggie room! :) Sounds adorable! I have a friend who left her job as a computer programmer to become an entomologist, we referred to lady bugs and butterflies as "socially acceptable bugs!" :) Last I knew she was studying wasps, and fascinated by them.

AdoreMyDogs
02-04-2007, 05:02 PM
The nursery sounds adorable and I am also looking forward to posts that tell about the arrival of your little girl. I would love to see the nursery. Our newest grandbaby is Annika who was born to chrangharris. Her nursery is also a bug theme with dragonflies and such. The bedding has a sagey green and rose color on the quilts and wallhangings. Maybe even the same bedding? :) I thinbk the other grandma, persianmom made the hangings from pieces of the matching fabric. If you sew, that might be something that would help you pass some of these final days of waiting?

PS I found a pic of the nursery:
http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid210/pa69e36027a533235d7706f27632e61de/edbac094.jpg

The day is coming soon and you will be in that nursery with a brand new daughter! :) :)

(((HUGS)))

I LOVE it! I love those bugs, the color, and most of all, the kitties hiding underneath their 'fort' :)

ramanth
02-04-2007, 11:49 PM
*HUGS*

Obviously I've never had a baby, but my mom had myself and my two sister via C-section. She said it wasn't so bad, even though mine was an emergancy C-section (her water broke and she was prepared to deliver me naturally, but I had to be taken out asap)

I'll pray that she turns for you. :)

IttyBittyKitty
02-05-2007, 02:22 AM
I've never had a bub either, but can I just say that I love seeing those cute little tickers all over PT! Another PT generation is on its way :D congrats and good luck to all the PT Mums to be!!