This is bugging me....

[RICHARD]

I was catching up on the news the other day...

I stopped at a channel where a teenage girl was describing her late term abortion for the host. She was 14 when she had the procedure done-and she wanted everyone to know about the doctor that did it

The next day I popped on the tube and Dr 'PILL' was talking to a former teacher who, before teaching, had made some porn movies that a sports team got a hold of..they passed them around and when it got around school the teacher was fired over the pics.

-----------------------------


Where are the parents in all this?

I can't comment on a LTA or doing porn, but why aren't the parents up in arms about their kids getting preggers or high school kids watching porn?

When I was younger I got caught with some Playboys and it was hell on my arse!


Now these parents are more incensed about a porn actress teaching their kids than they are about the little AHs watching the stuff and reenacting it while mom and dad are out on Saturday night?

What about a 14 yo kid getting pregnant? And then blaming the doctor for the 'worst thing" in her life.....

Please!


I am not advocating LTAs or porn....just the ability of parents to control, teach or set an example for their kids! :confused: :rolleyes:

[lizbud]

Richard, have you ever raised children? There are as many reasons
for failure to parent as there are families. :( :mad:

[katrina]

i was recently watching britians youngest mums and there was an 11 year old who had recently given birth on it! she got pregnant with her first time having sex!

[Pembroke_Corgi]

There have always been incompetent parents, it's not new to today's world. There always have been and there always will be, most likely.

The notion of "childhood" is actually a very modern idea. I'm not advocating that parents treat their children as adults by any means, but I don't understand how parents are less able than they used to be. Teen pregnancy has actually drastically declined in the last 15 years.

[CathyBogart]

Teen pregnancy has actually drastically declined in the last 15 years.

Do you have a link to that statistic? I'd like to share it elsewhere for another discussion.

[Cataholic]

While I am all for parental responsibility....sometimes even great parenting just doesn't do the trick.

[sparks19]

I was catching up on the news the other day...

I stopped at a channel where a teenage girl was describing her late term abortion for the host. She was 14 when she had the procedure done-and she wanted everyone to know about the doctor that did it

The next day I popped on the tube and Dr 'PILL' was talking to a former teacher who, before teaching, had made some porn movies that a sports team got a hold of..they passed them around and when it got around school the teacher was fired over the pics.

-----------------------------


Where are the parents in all this?

I can't comment on a LTA or doing porn, but why aren't the parents up in arms about their kids getting preggers or high school kids watching porn?

When I was younger I got caught with some Playboys and it was hell on my arse!


Now these parents are more incensed about a porn actress teaching their kids than they are about the little AHs watching the stuff and reenacting it while mom and dad are out on Saturday night?

What about a 14 yo kid getting pregnant? And then blaming the doctor for the 'worst thing" in her life.....

Please!


I am not advocating LTAs or porn....just the ability of parents to control, teach or set an example for their kids! :confused: :rolleyes:

all too true these days. Parents just want to pass the blame on to others. If you are unsuccessful at teaching your kids right from wrong that is the parents fault. If your child is just too disobedient to teach right from wrong... that is your fault.

I'm sick of the blame game.

[mugsy]

Teen pregnancy has actually drastically declined in the last 15 years.

Could have fooled me on this one... We have at least 3 girls pregnant where I teach. 1 7th grader and 2 8th graders. Last year I had one of my 8th grade girls who had gotten pregnant in 7th grade, have the kid and come back to school. The 8th grade girls wanted me to come to her shower...what is THAT about? I think not. I have, personally, seen a HUGE increase in teen pregnancy and it's only getting worse. Until we figure out a way for it not to be a status symbol, the problem is only going to get worse.

[Pam]

Could have fooled me on this one... We have at least 3 girls pregnant where I teach. 1 7th grader and 2 8th graders. Last year I had one of my 8th grade girls who had gotten pregnant in 7th grade, have the kid and come back to school. The 8th grade girls wanted me to come to her shower...what is THAT about? I think not. I have, personally, seen a HUGE increase in teen pregnancy and it's only getting worse. Until we figure out a way for it not to be a status symbol, the problem is only going to get worse.

How sad. My kids are grown so I am not *in the loop* about such things any more. Mugsy, are these girls keeping their babies or giving them up for adoption? I hope they are choosing to give them up as these babies will have a tough road ahead being raised by moms who are children themselves.

[Pembroke_Corgi]

Do you have a link to that statistic? I'd like to share it elsewhere for another discussion.
Yeah, I found a few decent web pages. Basically, they all say that since 1991, when there was a short peak in teen pregnancy, it has steadily declined since then. Here are a few links:

http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/pressroom/01news/trendpreg.htm

http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/PUBLICATIONS/factsheet/fsprechd.htm

http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/pressroom/02facts/teenbirths.htm


Could have fooled me on this one...

Mugsy, it is too bad that you see so many young girls that are pregnant. However, the data shows that overall, the rates have declined. Perhaps your school needs to implement a sex education program earlier.

[Twisterdog]

While I am all for parental responsibility....sometimes even great parenting just doesn't do the trick.

Absolutely true.

I have seen and heard about and personally know children who were raised by loving, caring, competent, excellent parents ... and the kids are absolutely horrid little beasts.

And I have also seen and heard about and personally know children who were raised by abusive, absent, clueless, manipulative, addicted worthless excuses for parents ... and the kids buck all the odds and do very well for themselves.

I do NOT believe in passing the buck. I do firmly believe in doing to best job you can raising your children, taking responsibility and teaching your children responsibility. But, saying that parents are ALWAYS to blame when a child "goes bad" is simply very wrong. Sometimes bad kids happen to good parents ... and visa versa.

And sometimes a good kid does a few bad things, or has a few bad months, or a few bad years. Things happen, children are their own people with their own ideas, morals and ethics, no matter how hard we try to mold them.

IMO, the only people who truly know with 100% certainty the single best way to raise children to have them turn out exactly right ... always seem to be the people who have never had children themselves.

[RICHARD]

Richard, have you ever raised children?

Child Protective Services will contact you tomorrow for even mentioning "children" and Richard in the same sentence...

[lizbud]

Child Protective Services will contact you tomorrow for even mentioning "children" and Richard in the same sentence...


Oh really. :D


Just wanted to add that you don't have to be a mom or dad to parent
a child. Sometimes is another adult relative or significant role model that
child wants to imitate. I think we really do need more good role models.

[Muddy4paws]

I'm 19 and when I was in school at the age of 15 there was about 4 teen mums all in my year.

I honestly think sex education at school is rubbish, they gave up the "talk" when we were 16 and about to leave school and its too late! I really think it needs to be taught at a much younger age to make everyone aware that it can happen first time and its not something to mess about with!

I knew a girl who used to have unprotected sex and then have the morning after pill to save herself, Its so dangerous and I really think it needs to be drummed into peoples heads that its not just a big game and its a life and you shouldn't mess about with it.

there really isn't any excuse for it, if its taught early enough it should stick and there are plenty of places to get protection even for under 16's so there is no excuse.

[TamanduaGirl]

Hmm I'm 31 and my first birds and bees talk in school was 4th grade. Mostly oit was about the chages that were about to occur and they passed around tampons and pads ect. But there was some mention about what it meant to and that it was for making babies someday. Of course a lot of parents opted their kids out of that day I think.

Then Junior high we had a whole Quarter of a sex ed class. They encouraged people to ask anything. Some of the questions that were asked, geesh, lol.

Maybe it's because my mom's a nurse and they didn't try to keep me inocent and answered questions ect. I was given a birds and bees book when real little that included pics of babies being born.

[buttercup132]

With all the "pressure" to be thin these days it makes me wonder why these girls would even think about having sex and risking getting pregnant because of having to loose all that extra weight and possibly have stretch marks.

[gemini9961]

With all the "pressure" to be thin these days it makes me wonder why these girls would even think about having sex and risking getting pregnant because of having to loose all that extra weight and possibly have stretch marks.

I think the pressure to have sex and be part of that crowd might be a little stronger than the pressure to be thin. Even overweight people have sex. :eek:

[buttercup132]

LoL oh I guess I worded that wong:o I don't know how to explain what I'm trying to say then lol.

[Marigold2]

Yes, even overweight and old people have sex every once in a while. Or so I've heard

[sparks19]

Yes, even overweight and old people have sex every once in a while. Or so I've heard

do you have a reliable source for this? ;) LOL

[RICHARD]

do you have a reliable source for this? ;) LOL

Rosie and Donald?

[kimlovescats]

Unfortunately, parents can make every effort to raise their kids in very parent-involved, loving, supportive, and moral based homes, but the children still choose to do otherwise. It is the lack of moral fiber in our world today. The media and general populaton has become so accepting of what should still be "wrong" that our children hardly stand a chance any more. :(

[jackmilliesmom]

It does not matter what influences are around them young people today are a law unto themselves. I have a neighbour who recently found her ten year old daughter having intercourse with a 13 year old boy while she was in the other room wiht the boy's mother.

When asked what they thought they were doing they said having sex why? the mother was floored and punished the daughter severely to which the young girl replied well if I do not do it here I will do it somewhere else! The mother has smacked this young girl in the face and grounded her and the young girl has called childline and told them she was being abused by her mother and father physically (beatings) and has now caused all sorts of trouble in teh home. She is an only child and has brought her parents to their knees in desperation.

So what you heard on teh radio is mild to what is actually going on. You need to wake up to it Richard - there is a way out for the children in this all the time. the other day while out grocery shopping a child threw a tantrum and the mother smacked the child on the hand and the child told her he was reporting her to childline and ran off to find a phone he was no more than 7.

Parents are at their wits end now there is too much emphises put on the childline and other charities that are there for the real abused children but some of these children are acting up to it and it should be put a stop to. As a child I would never dare defy my parents because I was always afraid of the consequences it would bring but not today they do it and there are no consequences because parents are afraid to smack the children when needed and also to correct them in any way as there are worse if not more consequences for the parents.

[kimlovescats]

You are so right, jackmilliesmom! It's getting to the point where the kids are the ones controlling the parents. What happened to "spare the rod, spoil the child"? While I do not believe in child abuse and excessive physical force, I think the old times of a good spanking made for much better disciplined children.

[Cataholic]

the mother was floored and punished the daughter severely to which the young girl replied well if I do not do it here I will do it somewhere else! The mother has smacked this young girl in the face and grounded her and the young girl has called childline and told them she was being abused by her mother and father physically (beatings) and has now caused all sorts of trouble in teh home. She is an only child and has brought her parents to their knees in desperation.


This paragraph shocks me. I can't imagine striking a child in the face. I think if this is the nature of the interactions between parent and child at 10, there are more problems than we know of. One doesn't just wake up one day, at age 10, and begin to act out in such a scary and damaging way. Nor does a parent wake up one day and decide to strike their child across the face.

I am really saddened by this. And, in the child's 'defense', often times there IS abuse in a household, and no one believes the child. Most people, abusing a child, do not self report. It isn't like the PARENT is going to say to childline, "yep, I beat my child".

[BOBS DAD]

I had that talk with all 3 of my children (well, let's say talks as it is a continuing, evolving process) - including my 2 girls. For whatever reason, my wife found it difficult and left the sex ed up to me. I started talking to them about all of this when they were as young as 7-8 years. About the time that they started noticing anatomical differences between us (wife and I) and themselves. I think that by starting these talks early on and keeping them age appropriate (simpler basic facts to start with) and adding more info (what swear words and generally inapopropriate terms mean) as they are ready and capable of handling it made it a lot easier for them to transition into adulthood without being traumatized or stigmatized by "not knowing" what was going on araound them.

[TamanduaGirl]

California is trying to pass a law making it abuse to spank your child.