I'm Tired of Feeling the Grinchy Spirit!

[Vela]

Christmas is not what it's supposed to be anymore and I'm personally tired of feeling disillusioned and and let down by the idiotic things people seem to be trying to do to ruin the holidays! Where is the love we are supposed to have for each other? It doesn't matter what color or race or religion, we are all PEOPLE. Why can't everyone agree to disagree about things we might NOT have in common, and come together over the things we do. I want MY OLD CHRISTMAS BACK! Yes I BELEIVE IN CHRISTMAS! If you don't that's okay, enjoy what you DO beleive in. I am not taking my tree down, I am not going to hand out cards that don't convey MY feelings. No more, I am taking back MY christmas, and I think you should all do the same for whatever YOU choose to celebrate.

Go to the store with a smile, let someone have your parking space, give a dollar to the guy with a bell. So what if people think you are nuts! If people would even just SMILE at each other the whole world would lighten up. Buy a present for the Toys for Tots, let someone ahead of you in line, take simple gifts to an old folks home or a homeless shelter...

I don't know why I'm babbling, I just suddenly got hit with a need to change things if even for myself or someone I know. We don't HAVE to let the grinches of the world steal our happy and giving spirits if we keep it alive for ourselves! Go out and do something unexpected and nice for someone else, and you'll feel a lot better too.

[wolflady]

Oh Vela, I know exactly what you mean! It certainly seems that Christmas isn't the same as it used to be...even 5 years ago. It is so sad that people are just so mean and PC these days. It used to be strangers smiling at each other in passing, holding doors open for people, letting someone merge on the highway without being a jerk about it...and so on.

I agree...I'm going to do Christmas MY way this year. I'm going to smile at people, even though most of them will avert their eyes. I'm still going to hold doors open for people, even though they don't utter so much as a thank you. I'm going to send my CHRISTMAS cards to all of my loved ones, because I want to wish them a Merry Christmas...and you know what? They won't get mad about it, even if they aren't Christian. Why? Because it's the time of year to be happy, celebrate our families and friends and all of the gifts in our lives. :)

**hugs**

[moosmom]

Vela,

What a great thread and SOOOO true. Christmas to me has become so commercialized. Everyone is in a hurry and short tempered. I've been trying to do a random act of kindness every day. I hold a door, help someone put their groceries in their car, help out an older person, stuff like that. It makes me feel good. I've also tried to be more pleasant, saying "good morning" to people and smiling. Life is just too short to walk around being angry all the time.

[kimlovescats]

I agree, and it saddens me as well. Like you said, just go ahead and be the one who spreads Christmas cheer, even if people don't reciprocate! ;) It will make your heart feel better and although it isn't obvious, it will probably make those people feel better as well! ;)

[Laura's Babies]

I agree, we need to take Christmas back and have it like it use to be. I don't have a "Holiday Tree" I have a CHRISTMAS TREE!"

[chocolatepuppy]

Great thread Vela. Christmas just goes by way too fast. It seems I'm always so busy and then it's over. Not enough time to enjoy it :(

[Giselle]

When I'm feeling like the world around me is collapsing, I just list 5 things that I would want to do regardless of money, time, or whatever. Then I make a list of things I know I am able to do. If/When I finish that second list, I'll make another. Even if people around me are not reciprocating that same hearty feeling, I'll still have consolation in knowing that I contributed to society. I remember there was a little story about a man who would have refrained from committing suicide if just one person had smiled at him or given him recognition. Ultimately, he died. I don't remember if it was true, but even if it wasn't, it holds a strong message: The simplest things we do shape not only the future of ourselves but of everybody else, as well.

In this day and age, we're all about self-improvement. Unfortunately, self-improvement causes some people to look a little too far into themselves. In a world of falsehood, a single good deed is a revolution in itself.

[Twisterdog]

My husband and I just had a heated discussion about this tonight.

I have never been one to buy my son "everything" he wants or spends an excessive amount of money on Christmas. I just don't think that is what it is about. I buy him a few nice things, sure ... but I also do things like getting a few of his favorite candy bars and packs of gum and wrapping them up. I want him to learn it's the thought and the love that counts, not the dollar amount.

My husband, OTOH, has always spent thousands of dollars on his kids. He seems to think they won't be happy and won't have a "good" Christmas if they don't get mountains of expensive presents.

We're trying to meet in the middle, since this is our first Christamas together since getting married, but it's tough. He's saying, "But we can afford it. It's Christmas. I just got my bonus check ..." and I'm saying, "But we don't need to do it. It's not the point ..." *sigh*

I'm just not feeling the Christmas spirit. I'm feeling like an ATM machine. :(

[JenBKR]

I am so glad that you started this thread. I haven't really felt much in the Christmas spirit this year, and I wasn't really sure why. But I think you all hit the nail on the head for me...Christmas doesn't seem to be the way it used to be. It has always been a magical time for me, of giving and love. But it seems that in the last few years it's gertting more and more about getting the best, most expensive gifts. I think that to change my feelings, I will change myself. I will also smile, help others when possible, even if I don't get a thank you.

Thanks for starting this thread, it's good to know it's not just me feeling this way.

[Anita Cholaine]

I agree with everybody here. I just can't feel the Christmas spirit that I used to feel when I was little. It's so commercialized, like if the only way we had to show our love would be by buying the most expensive presents.

Everybody gets so violent and stressed. It's incredible the ammount of accidents there are here on Christmas eve. It's so sad that for lots of people, the best way of celebrating is by drinking in excess and losing control.

You're so right, Chrstmas is not what it is supposed to be anymore. At least there are many of us who are planning to celebrate it in the old way ;)

[finn's mom]

I don't shop during November and December, because the whole commercial aspect of Christmas is overwhelming and disappointing. But, as far as taking Christmas back, I never gave it up in the first place. I say "Merry Christmas" and "Happy Holidays" to everyone I can. If someone wants to say something negative back, that's the chance I take, but, I haven't had that happen yet. People either return the salutation, or say nothing (and I don't always take it to mean they don't celebrate Christmas, sometimes they don't hear me or it's a surprise to be greeted at all to them and they are shocked!). Anyway, I know what the holidays mean to me, and, honestly, just because I say "Merry CHRISTmas" doesn't mean I'm celebrating anything to do with Jesus. I'm not a religious person in the slightest, so Christmas to me, take it or leave it, is simply a reminder to love your family, friends, neighbors, etc. I think it's sad that people are so afraid to share the spirit nowadays. I am hopeful, though, that people will go back to what they believe in.

[jackmilliesmom]

What a wonderful thread you should see my thread about my husband and his Christmas Spirit - to me that is what Christmas is about and I truly believe that we should all live by that standard. Whilst most of my family close and extended buy gift vouchers at christmas my husband and I buy little gifts for each person and then we enclose a gift voucher also but that comes with their New Year Card and they get their little present on Christmas morning which I thnks is all part of the magic. We do not go in for expensive gifts as we feel that money is not the root of the Chirstmas spirit.

[borzoimom]

Vela- I could not agree more! and When did people stop caring? And donate to a " clothes closet" at a church etc.. Help someone with their cart- .. We are taking our Christmas back too..

[mruffruff]

I started to do this a couple of years ago, but I do it all year long. Open doors for others, give heartfelt compliments, give free bread to a needy neighbor, etc.

I still give my granddaughter a couple of gifts at Christmas, but I don't go wild. She doesn't need a lot of "stuff", so I put something into an account for her instead.

One year Santa left a dog house for a tied-out puppy.
Earlier this year I collected furniture for a family without any.
This Christmas I'm building a dog house for a needy Great Dane.

Jackmilliesmom's husband is my hero. He really has the Christmas spirit.

[Miss Z]

It doesn't matter what color or race or religion, we are all PEOPLE. Why can't everyone agree to disagree about things we might NOT have in common, and come together over the things we do. I want MY OLD CHRISTMAS BACK! Yes I BELEIVE IN CHRISTMAS! If you don't that's okay, enjoy what you DO beleive in. I am not taking my tree down, I am not going to hand out cards that don't convey MY feelings. No more, I am taking back MY christmas, and I think you should all do the same for whatever YOU choose to celebrate.


I'm in total agreement there! It was on the news the other day that the majority of businesses are not allowed to put up decorations in the office as it offends people of other religions. Now I'm all for equality and the end of discrimination, but I found that stupid. It's something celebrated all around the world, why should we hide it? Just because others may not agree with the times we like to celebrate doesn't mean we have to excuse ourselves, and actually I think it doesn't offend most people of other faiths anyway.

Hooray for Christmas!!!

[Argranade]

What happened?,

What happened to singing at your nabours door or roasting marsh mellows by an open fire, walking in the cold night with the snow sparkling like stars in your friends eyes, where have all the nativity sets gone?, why don't people smile anymore or say Merry Christmas as often?, what happened to peace on earth and good will towards men?, where are all the families going to church before Christmas day or building a snow man ... afterwards getting your fingers cold then warming them with some hot chocolate?, what ever happened to hand made gifts from the heart?, what ever happened to eating turkey and stuffing with out thinking of the next day?, where has the importance of '' the more you give the more you recieve'' gone?, why not buy some toys for the poor and not the selfish, why not think of the day a King was born not a fake man?,

Events & thoughts like these have been replaced by fake items and rushed feelings.

[momoffuzzyfaces]

I plan on wishing every one a "Merry Christman" until they start arresting me for it. Then I'll be telling everyone in jail a "Merry Christmas". :D

I try to let others go ahead of me in lines all during the year. I figure since I'm not working I'm not in a hurry and they may be. (unless my pain from my arthritis is making it so hard I can hardly stand)

The filling between my two front teeth just fell out so I'm sure people get an extra thrill when I grin at them. But hey, I'm not going to hide in a hole just because I look like a jack-o-lantern when I grin.

MERRY CHRISTMAS ALL!!! :D

[K9soul]

We've talked about this and you know I completely agree with you. And it's not just Christmas of course, but the self-centered, rushed, every-man-for-himself attitude that prevails all year round so much now. This Christmas is a perfect time to make a new start at trying to do more and see/participate more in the world around you, to try to stop mourning what has been lost and focus on making of it what you can. Sometimes I find myself so caught up in my own problems and anxieties I get bogged down, forget to think of others and forget to see the "small" wonders of life. A little reminder is always welcome. Plus, somehow my own problems and anxieties just seem to fade a bit each time I reach out and do something selfless for someone else :)

[Vela]

I didn't expect so many replies to this, but it makes me happy to see it! Jackmilliesmom, your husband is a wonderful man to do what he is doing. We need more people like him in this world. I have never stopped being courteous myself, but I really found myself lacking the happiness I should feel at Christmas, and even every day of the year. The news and the things happening with things like no christmas plays because one person doesn't celebrate it, no carols because one says Christ in it, no trees (which isn't a symbol of christianity anyway!), no goodwill towards anyone and fighting over toys and prsents and people being SHOT for them. I mean the everyday news is bad enough all year round, but to see those types of things aroung the holidays, when it used to be a "cease fire" for that type of thing for the most part, really had me so depressed. I am so happy to see all the replies and I hope all of us strive that much harder to enjoy our blessings!

I hope all of you have the most awesome holiday in whatever way you chose to celebrate it and enjoy even the "ugly" gifts you might get. It IS the thought that counts!!!!

[Daisy and Delilah]

Vela, I have felt exactly like you do for many years. Christmas has become a real drudgery for me rather than an enjoyable event.

After dreading the holiday season for so many years, I decided to change things this year. With my sister's help, we chose a family to help instead of punishing ourselves with the buying of gifts for each other. None of us need anything and trying to come up with ideas just because we were supposedly required to, wasn't getting it.

On of my sister's students(she's a fourth grade teacher)has a younger brother with leukemia. His Mom is single and financially unable to give the kids a Christmas. She is swamped with medical bills in addition to everything else, so Christmas was not going to happen in their house this year.

My family decided to buy gifts for the kids, get them a tree with all the decorations, and buy their groceries for their dinner. In addition to that, we are giving the Mom a check to get everything else she might need.

We are also receiving a great deal of support from most of our employers and other people of the community. Everyone wanted to help out after hearing the story. I'm truly amazed at the outpouring of the community.

I've haven't felt this good about Christmas in a very long time. It's just great to help this family.
I'm thrilled to share this story with my fellow PT'ers also. I'm with you Vela. Let's take our Christmas back!! :)

[Vela]

Oh what a wonderful idea!!! Thank you so much for sharing that story. We did that last year as well, we took up a collection and were able to buy the family christmas and brought it to them wrapped and ready to go and were able to give them some money as well. Doesn't that make you feel so much better! Thanks for sharing, that brightens my day to hear it.

[Daisy and Delilah]

It's absolutely amazing how good I feel about this!! To keep with tradition and make my Mother happy, we still bought gifts for each other but kept a $20 limit for each person. Mostly gift cards so we didn't have to endure the torture of holiday shopping. All of us will feel like a million bucks on Christmas day and enjoy our time together instead of worrying about the gifts we normally bought for each other.

I strongly recommend this for everybody! :)

[Dorothy39]

We've talked about this and you know I completely agree with you. And it's not just Christmas of course, but the self-centered, rushed, every-man-for-himself attitude that prevails all year round so much now. This Christmas is a perfect time to make a new start at trying to do more and see/participate more in the world around you, to try to stop mourning what has been lost and focus on making of it what you can. Sometimes I find myself so caught up in my own problems and anxieties I get bogged down, forget to think of others and forget to see the "small" wonders of life. A little reminder is always welcome. Plus, somehow my own problems and anxieties just seem to fade a bit each time I reach out and do something selfless for someone else :)

Every relpy to this thread is incredible!!

And!

Every single Christmas, I clamor about and gather "food", clothing, supplies , and tug at the coat sleeves of my friends and family members to donate and share!!!

Not only during Christmas, but throughout the year~

I've done so for such a long, long time~This Christmas Holds a New Meaning for my Purpose. I might be tired, from gathering all the food, sorting through the clothing for " Pristine" aparel,(washing and refreshing un used clothing) and storing away staples that are a "must" for those in dire need~

I feel the True Essence of Christmas every year~My personal problems dissolved when I donated to "The Homeless Shelter" in our area this afternoon~

Christmas is a State of Mind~

[Vela]

What a wonderful thing you do each year Dorothy! Thank you for sharing that. I know what you mean about it being a state of mind. In "taking back how christmas used to be" for myself, I want to keep the feeling all year round and try not to let the stresses and trials of life get me down, but try to have a smile for each new day we are blessed with on this earth, and to be thankful for all of the things we do have, stop lamenting those things we don't, and always take time to help someone in need, even if it's just to hold the door because their arms ar full. You guys have all really helped brighten my holiday, and it really does feel like "old times" again.

[momoffuzzyfaces]

I used to save my pennies all year long and then in November cash them in and use the money for toys for the Salvation Army toy box. I'd sometimes have to add a bit too it but it was well worth it. Sadly, the Salvation army moved out of town this year and I don't know of any one having a local toy drive.

We do have a program where you can adopt a family for Christmas. Unfortunately, I can't afford to do that but lots of people can.