For EVERYONE to read

[buttercup132]

A really nice fellow PTer pmed me telling me I wasnt acting the same and was being really snappy and kinda rude to alot of people. I just thought I'd try to explain why and what I think the problem is.

1) I recently lost Buddy who was a amazing horse I can finish riding him tilll the end of the month until then I'm done until spring. Riding is a MAJOR stress reliver for me. It clears my mind of alot of things and makes me feel alot better.
I havnt been riding for the past week causing me to be really stressed and having it all held in.

2)My friend and I were on bad terms, its a really complicated realationship and I do say some things behind her back if I dont like what she has done and I think someone over herd me and told her. I acted calm about it and now this week things are back to normal.

3)I have TONS of homework to catch up on because I dont have lunch with my good friends Ive been skipping english class to go to lunch with them. And I have been sick with who knows what and have gone home a couple times.

4)This is the major problem with me on PT right now is two certain members on here that keep harassing me.
I'm sure you know who the one is , and I dont get why she cant leave me alone. Ive tried to keep my temper cool with her but I'm am about ready to burst!!

The other PT member tries to be a constant know it all when she knows nothing at all and is just trying to seem like she knows more then everyone. And has beeen pming me and friends trying to make it seem likes shes king sh*t and better then everyone. And claming that we are cruel to our animals and that she is a expert on every animal. And ya she would be the one who was saying I had acne issues(not that I have a problemw ith people who do but I know for one I dont) She just hasnt hit puburty yet because shes so young and dosent know that people *gasp* DO get pimples!!

People constantly have been posting in the wrong area and I dont understand why. Its not hard to read the links ,there in bold!
Why cant people take the time to put them in the right places!?!!?!?

5) One of my best friends is going to rehab for 4 months because of a drinking problem.

6) I have been getting into alot of fights at school with fellow peers.

7) My job dosent pay enough and I dont get enough hours so I am running super low on money (wich is another reason why I havnt got a new horse) I can barley pay my phone bill. Ive been trying to get a new job but the one place that actually called didnt hire me because I wont give up my other grooming job because they offered for my schooling. I cant work at a place like walkmart because of my peircings and the one by my eye I cant take out because it will close very fast.
Id love to work at petsmart but they wont even let you dye your hair!!!
And I'm sure they flip if they ever found out I had tattoos (and I'm getting a noticable one soon) so IF I did work there I'd always have to cover it.
Same with Walmarts.
I wont work at a fast food place because its too rushed the people that come in are also usually in a rush and become grumpy if you do the slightest thing wrong. And I dont feel comfortable in that enviroment because when I worked at tim Hortons I got hit on by older men wich made me uncomfortable and there was one guy who would come evrytime I was working and would only let me serv him.

8) Little problems at home that just come up

9) I don really have anyone to talk to from PT who would understand where I'm coming from. The only person who I was reallly good friends with was Breanna (Roxyluvsme13) but she cant afford internet and he laptop got stolen so..

I know people on PT say pm if you want to talk but I cant just randomly pm someone and just start ranting , that would be a little awkward.

Thats all for now
I just thought Id try to explain some problems and why I am grumpy latley. I cant not come on PT the adorale aniamls pictures on here make me happy. And I still like knowing whats going on, so taking a break form PT I dont think would be a good idea.

Noone has to reply but I just want everyone to read this to know.

[Husky15]

I know that you know who I am, but I'm gonna reply.

Those are lots of things to have on your plate and I know I'd be getting pretty down from all that.

We haven't really started a big fight, just talked things over on PM. I don't want to be on bad terms with you or anybody else on this site. So shall we call it a truce?

The person who has been PMing you and saying you have acne problems is very immature. One day she'll get pimples and we'll see what she thinks then. To be honest, I don't think I've heard of something more immature then that.

By the way, sometimes taking a break really helps. But if you think it wouldn't then that's your decision.

[k9krazee]

Maybe you just need a little break from PT? I know that there've been times where things got stressful and its always good to leave for a bit and take a deep breath. :)

Oh, I just read that you don't think taking a break would be a good idea. *shrugs*

[luvofallhorses]

I agree with Ashley. Maybe you should take a break from pet talk for a little while to cool down. :) everyone needs a break once in awhile.


People constantly have been posting in the wrong area and I dont understand why. Its not hard to read the links ,there in bold!
Why cant people take the time to put them in the right places!?!!?!?

sometimes people mean to put them in the right places and newbies don't know where to put the thread. :) I am just saying. :) take care and I hope things get better for you soon! I really do. :)

[catnapper]

I'm sorry you're having a hard time.

We all have challenges in life. Its life, no excuse to be condemning to others. Stress only gets worse the older you get. If you are so stressed and behind in school, why on earth spend so much time here? This should be way down on priorities. Homework and school first.

As for the people posting in wrong areas, I was here nearly a year before I realized there was anything outside cat general! I stay away from Dog General for personal reasons so Miss Nicki doesn't get the exposure she deserves.

As a mom, I want to scream at you: what on earth are you skipping class for?!?! Stop that now young lady!!

[wolf_Q]

The other PT member tries to be a constant know it all when she knows nothing at all and is just trying to seem like she knows more then everyone. And has beeen pming me and friends trying to make it seem likes shes king sh*t and better then everyone. And claming that we are cruel to our animals and that she is a expert on every animal. And ya she would be the one who was saying I had acne issues(not that I have a problemw ith people who do but I know for one I dont) She just hasnt hit puburty yet because shes so young and dosent know that people *gasp* DO get pimples!!

People constantly have been posting in the wrong area and I dont understand why. Its not hard to read the links ,there in bold!
Why cant people take the time to put them in the right places

Is this supposed to be an apology for your behavior? If so, I found it rude...even if this person was being that way with you, you publicly being rude back is not going to solve anything. I think you need to work out your problems with these PTers with Karen, or simply put them on your ignore list.

If somebody posting in the wrong area bothers you so much, then just ignore it or at least tell them in a *polite* manner. Not everyone knows exactly how to use a forum, especially if they are new. I'm sure I made mistakes like that when I first joined Pet Talk, and I certainly would not still be here if I was treated that way in my first few posts. You are not the PT Police, you can notify Karen if a thread needs to be moved, she is the only one that can do it anyway.

We all have issues in our lives (some much worse than yours I guarantee it), but please try to not take it out on everyone else here at Pet Talk.

[Husky15]

I cant work at a place like walkmart because of my peircings and the one by my eye I cant take out because it will close very fast.

They actually have things out for that. I forget what they're called, but they're like clear things that you stick in your piercing holes for reasons such as the one why you can't work at Wal-Mart and it will make it so you can't really tell that you have a piering but keep it healed at the same time. But where your piercing is located it would be easier to see it, so that might not even work.

[Corinna]

I know we all have "issuses" in our lives so thats not an excuse . I want to say this as help not to be critical. I have found some of your replies come from your heart and you mean well by them . But my mom told me something all my life, it's not what you say but how you say it. there are ways to tell some one to go to blazes and do it so they almost thank you for it.
I have found a lot of newer people have that problem so it's not just you. As a member of the older generation we were taught langauge and it useage , today the schools just don't do that. it's not the fault of the kids or teachers just so much PC (politacal correctness) and mandated junk they have to teach ( Alot that should be a parents responabilty)that real learning and socailay acceptable skills are passed by . (sorry I just will get off my soap box now.
I don't think a break is what you need but just think and read your replies a couple times put your self in the other persons place how would you feel if you got that reply. (this goes for most all of us I know I have been guilty of it too)

[Daisy and Delilah]

buttercup-I really think it took guts on your part to come forward and explain your reasons for rudeness. Thanks to the nice PT'er that PM'd you. That was a great effort on their part to keep peace among our community members here. After saying that; I agree with Kim(catnapper) in saying that things will only get worse as you get older. It's unfortunate but true. Yes, believe it, you'll look back on what you're going through now and it will be known in the future as "some of the best days of your life". Paying a phone bill will be nothing compared to paying rent/mortgage, water bill, car payment, car insurance, clothing costs for your family, food costs, childcare expenses, electric bill, heating fuel bill, gasoline bill, medical bills(doctors, prescriptions, hospital bills), etc. etc., in addition to the phone bill. I'm sorry but that's only part of it.
It really bothers me that you seem to think that everyone should know everything about this board. I was here for over two years before I knew anything besides commenting on DOTD. Give people a break. They have to learn. Just because you know where things are, doesn't mean everyone else does.
I'm really sorry that you couldn't have said something nice to Tim about his kid's pictures. Those are his children for heaven's sake. Some day you might have children too. How would you feel if someone didn't even acknowledge the pictures of your beautiful children that you're so proud of? He was so happy to share his children with all of us and what did he get from you? A cold response that indicated he was posting in the wrong area. Put yourself in his place. While I'm on this subject. This isn't the first rude comment you've made to other members. Correct me if I'm wrong fellow PT'ers, but, your rudeness started a long long time ago.
I'm really sorry to hear that you're having problems. We all have problems. Some days I'm lucky to be able to walk into the kitchen to get my pain pills for the terrible arthritis I suffer from. We have many members here with similar or worse problems than I have. That's just one of my problems but believe me, there are many. I just choose not to elaborate here. I'll just say this, I could tell you stories that could curl your hair. Now, having said that, no matter how many hardships I have or how many difficult things I've been through or are going through, I try to manage to be cordial, respectful, and thoughtful as much as I possibly can be. I may feel lousy but I always try to have a good word for all of our community members.
I apologize if I've offended you or anyone else here. I have kept my mouth shut as long as I can. I hope your problems get straightened out and you can become a happier person. My biggest piece of advice to you.....enjoy your life now, while you're young. Be thankful for what you have, buckle down and get that school work done. Stop skipping classes and improve your situation. You have to do it yourself. No one can do it for you.

[mugsy]

I'm going to get myself in trouble here, but, here goes...

This crap is the reason I left Pet Talk for over a year. As of now, I will just stick to posting the transports and move on.

I am tired of excuses for bad behavior. I deal with it everyday at school with the kids...it's always someone else's fault and I'm tired. If you act badly, apologize and move on. Don't give excuses...just apologize...

As my best friend told me once (and I REALLY deserved it): "As Dr Phil would say, 'build a bridge and get over it!'" I know it's harsh, but, it's the reality of the thing.

[Lori Jordan]

I'm sorry you have been having problems,we all do life is most the time far from normal.But that does not give you the right to be iggnorant to people,That is no excuse,And you have been this way to me for a long time so what is your excuse for that? i'm not trying to start a fight but i am going to speak my mind.
In all the post around here you say nice things,When i post something instead of saying you have nice dogs.You add a ?,and most times are rude but i never say anything,Reason it dont look good when a 35 year old is fighting with a 15 year old,As too people posting in the wrong places,I have done it many times,it is a simple mistake there is no reason for getting mad,People do make mistakes it is human.

I hope that everything falls into place for you,Life is hard,But we are better people from the problems we have had and worked through them,But if you snap at people all the time(and yes i have blown my top).But i can admit to my issues and move on.But in the long run no one will be there for you in the end if you treat them with no respect,You say you notice you have been snappy lately,Think about the people that are not even involved getting snapped at they do not deserve it and it is not fair if you take your problems out on people that no one can fix for you,Your the only one that can fix your problems.
Now with that being said.If your having a bad day do something that calms you,Something that can clear you mind,You have animals they are the best healers,They are the only ones that you can count on in these situations they never turn there back on you,Start spending time with them,and you will see how much happier you are,Trust me it works.....Good luck.hope everything will start getting better.

[sasvermont]

I think many folks never learn good coping skills and/or survival skills. I think parents teach them to you, yes? Having said that, I would go to a school counselor or professional counselor and ask for help. They will teach you how to deal with issues, how to keep on track with your school work and will most likely be the support you need. You need to do the work though. They can only give you direction - like we are trying to do.

Life is short, play hard!

And if the shoe fits, use spell check (advice for everyone here)....the IeSpell thing is wonderful! Thank you....... to the person recommending it. It makes me look brilliant now!

[Pawsitive Thinking]

Add the annoying pm'ers to your ignore list then do precisely that with any of their threads - ignore them! Do not reply however tempting it is

So, people post things in the wrong place? If it was a real problem Karen and Paul would deal with it

Don't struggle with school work - get some help and advice

and finally, you've done a good thing here recognising that you have problems and what is causing them - some people go through life never admitting to a single mistake.

Learn to like you again, we all do

[trayi52]

I agree with the people here at Pet Talk. If you are jumping on our cases, what are you doing to the people that surround you physically? Just wondering.

Don't spend so much time here young lady, if you are so behind on your homework, go right now, and start on that homework! I am 53 years old and have raised three kids, they done their homework before they started anything else!

Maybe you do need to see a counselor, they can help a lot. Hope you get your life straightened out.

Willie

[Pam]

I'm really sorry that you couldn't have said something nice to Tim about his kid's pictures. Those are his children for heaven's sake. Some day you might have children too. How would you feel if someone didn't even acknowledge the pictures of your beautiful children that you're so proud of? He was so happy to share his children with all of us and what did he get from you? A cold response that indicated he was posting in the wrong area. Put yourself in his place.

D&D, what a beautiful reply. I hope that Buttercup will take a lot of the advice that you gave. The bottom line is "Do unto others." When you are about to say something critical just think about how you would feel being on the receiving end of that comment.

BC I noticed that in your apology, which was a first big step by the way, you mentioned having trouble with some friends and at home. I suspect that the personality that you have projected here is pretty much the personality that you display everywhere. You might want to take a good hard internal look at yourself and see what it is that you are doing to bring on these problems.

Laying out the problems that you have as sort of an excuse for your behavior takes away from your apology. When we apologize, and mean it, we aren't hiding behind anything. We are simply saying "I am sorry. I was wrong. Please forgive me. Period."

I don't want to bring your parents into this, because often parents are blamed for the behavior of their children, but kids who are old enough to post here are certainly old enough to have carved out their own thinking/behavior. I do feel, though, that kindness is something that needs to be learned at home and at a young age.

My advice would be to give your studies 100% of your time. You will be very glad in the years to come. Also, stop making excuses about why you can't work here and why you can't work there. There may come a time when you are an adult, and your job has been dissolved due to downsizing and you find yourself at a job you hate just to put food on the table in the interim. It happens to people all the time. The ability to get along with people and adapt to change comes with maturity. You are not too old to still have a few things yet to learn.

(((Hugs))) to you D&D. I had no idea of the pain you live with. You are one of my favorite PTers and your cheerful attitude and sweetness shines through despite what may be going on behind the scenes. http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v80/Belrip/Graphics/huggroup.gif

[K9soul]

Terry and Pam spoke my thoughts as if they were reading my mind. I wasn't going to say anything about this, I certainly have enough to deal with without getting involved in any kind of debate or conflict, but what I have to say is simply advice, take it or leave it.

No matter what you are going through, how hard things are, you will feel better about yourself and the world if you make a point to be kind and compassionate to others. If you are feeling pain, anger, frustration, stress, then taking a moment to just say a kind word or show understanding for someone can help heal the burden you carry. The more you do this, the more it will come back on you, and you will find yourself enjoying life more, and able to handle things much easier that before made you miserable. When I am stressed and down, and snap at someone, I only feel that much worse. But if I turn that around and try to put a smile on someone's face or be a shoulder to lean on instead, I feel uplifted and stronger inside.

[Russian Blue]

I don't reply to these types of posts since I figure the OP only wants to hear what they want to hear. But I thought I would live a little ( ;) ) and respond to some of the issues you are facing. Remember, I only know you from your words on this forum so take that into consideration as well.


I have TONS of homework to catch up on because I dont have lunch with my good friends Ive been skipping english class to go to lunch with them.

Now, this is your choice of prioritizing your responsibilities. If you're falling behind on your homework you know what needs to be done. Just remember, your friends will not grant you a diploma or admit you into college/university. ;)


This is the major problem with me on PT right now is two certain members on here that keep harassing me.

This is easy! :D Place the member on your ignore list. PM Karen to discuss the harassment issue. Problem solved! I often think that some people on the various forums enjoy the drama since it allows them to be the center of attention. You have the choice to move forward or stay involved.


People constantly have been posting in the wrong area and I dont understand why. Its not hard to read the links ,there in bold!

It may not be hard to read the links, but who says everyone checks every forum? When I first came on here I only went to Cat General since I really didn't spend the time investigating the whole area. Don't assume people read and interpret things the way you do. If you have any problems with PT - PM Karen to tell her of your concerns. If she's not seeing it as a problem, then you have your answer.


I have been getting into alot of fights at school with fellow peers.

This seems to be a control issue surrounding your emotions and/or communication skills. Since there are so many other issues in your life it would be a good time to talk to someone. Check out your guidance department for life skills coaching. If they don't offer anything there are certainly other resources they can recommend. Life will most likely get more difficult so it's important to deal with these issues now.




My job dosent pay enough and I dont get enough hours so I am running super low on money (wich is another reason why I havnt got a new horse) I can barley pay my phone bill. Ive been trying to get a new job but the one place that actually called didnt hire me because I wont give up my other grooming job because they offered for my schooling. I cant work at a place like walkmart because of my peircings and the one by my eye I cant take out because it will close very fast.
Id love to work at petsmart but they wont even let you dye your hair!!!
And I'm sure they flip if they ever found out I had tattoos (and I'm getting a noticable one soon) so IF I did work there I'd always have to cover it.
Same with Walmarts.
I wont work at a fast food place because its too rushed the people that come in are also usually in a rush and become grumpy if you do the slightest thing wrong.

I see this as excuse after excuse. What is your priority...piercings/tatooes/hair colour or income? You are limiting your employment choices by your own fashion sense. You always have choices but you are seriously limiting them. Also, I totally see you playing the victim rather than taking control of your life. Many of us would *love* to have a choice of jobs but many of us have to take the less than perfect jobs to pay the bills and save. You sacrifice at the beginning to gain some experience and income to put yourself through school/courses. In turn, this will open up more employment options down the road since you can offer an employer more advanced skills and experience.



[b]I just thought Id try to explain some problems and why I am grumpy latley. I cant not come on PT the adorale aniamls pictures on here make me happy. And I still like knowing whats going on, so taking a break form PT I dont think would be a good idea.

Your actions speak louder than words throughout your life. Many people are going through hardships during their lives but they don't pass these on to others. I think it's great your trying to explain your actions...but in the real world many people won't take the time to listen. That's why it's so important to gain the life skills to control these emotions and learn to react and communicate more effectively from the start.

And before anyone says that I haven't had a hard life, think again. My father passed away when I was 16. When everyone else was worried about getting a car and license I was worried how my mother and I would survive on a daily basis. I moved out on my own at 19. I paid my way through University by working two jobs on top of a full course load. I also purchased my first home at the age of 24. I was able to do this because I made many sacrifices to put myself ahead of the game - since no one else was going to bail me out. I could have easily played the victim, but it's so not me. ;)

[moosmom]

Russian Blue and Wolf Q,


I see this as excuse after excuse


Is this supposed to be an apology for your behavior

At the risk of taking her off my ignore list and trying to give her the benefit of the doubt, which I do with everyone, in the hopes that with the explanation would come an apology (not to me for obvious reasons),it didn't surprize me in the least, that her whole thread is just another MEA CULPA.

Oh well. :rolleyes:

[mugsy]

I do have one more thing to say....

As an educator, you need to go to class. It doesn't matter whether you like the class or not or whether you can't eat lunch with your friends. There is time after school to visit with your friends. School is not a social event...you're there to learn. I will say that socialization is part of it, but, the main idea of school is for you to learn.

If you have a job, and expect to keep it, skipping work is not an option. Right now your full time job is school. Look at it that way. Your pay check is your grades and ultimately your diploma.

Stop making excuses and start getting done what needs to be done.

[cyber-sibes]

Buttercup, I've been thinking of what to write for a while. You are young and have your unscripted future ahead of you-- think of this as a reality check. My comments are variations of things I've told my own sons.

Your life will never change if YOU don't change.
Take responsibility for your own welfare. I don't feel sorry for you because you are the one making these decisions. Fights don't "just happen", and everything going wrong is not someone else's fault.

You want a good paying job? Not likely unless you get your homework done & get your diploma. Even low-paying jobs want HS grads.
How you treat your body is your right - who to hire is the right of every employer.
GOOD JOBS go to those who have skills, training, and who PLAY WELL WITH OTHERS.

Life is not a piece of cake, we ALL go through hardships. Some get resolved quickly, others go on for years. Take advantage of the opportunities you have now - including working with a counselor at school or otherwise. They can help you understand how you got where you are, and offer tools to help you with your difficulties. Only you can get yourself onto another path.

[Randi]

I was thinking of replying to this thread earlier, but was having a hard time explaining exatcly what I meant, but Russian Blue has summed it up perfect ly. :)

You really need to think about what your priorities are. Good luck! ;)

[Argranade]

Alicia,

It's ok if you feel sad or mad I mean its all part of growng up right?, I can have such lousy days or get realy pissed off at people I try my hardest not to take it out on others...but sadly that does not always work out then I cause a huge problem which I could have prevented.

For telling that other member to move,sure maybe it could have been said nicer but maybe it's filling up on you because so many new or even old members are doing this & you just wan't them to read where things are supposed to go...sadly not all members are going to remember this but then thats where we have to corect them in a nice way.

I'm not mad at all for you telling that member to move her post, it was a one time thing as I never heard you say it like that before, or maybe you didn't eveb relize what you where saying at the time from problems in your life so you just wrote what ever popped into your head (I do that alot). :o

People should have not got soo mad at you for that, what a respectable person would do is, try to ask you in a nice way why you typed it so mad like.

People jump to conclusions with out even thinking, Hello!! did anyone ever think maybe this girl is having a hard time in her life because people don't get mad for no reason...there is always a reason & maybe if someone would have tryed to talk nicer, things would have not turned into a fight.

''Think before you do!''

Don't worry Alicia things will get better, sometimes things get worse before they get better..and that can realy suck but we have to live with it. ;)

[Edwina's Secretary]

You want everyone to read this? Okay...

1.) Go to those English classes...your post contains so many errors...wrong word...grammar, spelling....you need the class far more than lunch with your friends...

2.) Life is full of choices and every choice has a consequence. Lots of piercing and tattoo...your choice....employers don't want to hire you...their choice (and NO...it is not illegal.)

3.) Have you apologized to Tim yet? Not given excuses ....APOLOGIZED....said..."I was rude and I am sorry?"
Because you were...rude that is. Starting a thread in what you consider the wrong place has to be the silliest thing about which to be rude.

[Alysser]

Terry and Pam, I am in complete agreement with you both. No one could have said it better.

Buttercup, I'm sorry your having issues in your life. Everyone has them and being rude to people on PT isn't going to help you with yours. It's really not an excuse.

[critter crazy]

2.) Life is full of choices and every choice has a consequence. Lots of piercing and tattoo...your choice....employers don't want to hire you...their choice (and NO...it is not illegal.)
exactly! you cannot blame people for not hiring , because you chose to do these things! It was your choice and now you must face the consequences of these actions. Find a diferent job, there are plenty out there.

[Argranade]

If Alicia wanted to do those things yes it was her choice,

That's so stupid not hiring someone because there freaking lip is peirced how pathetic... what next... ''Im sorry but we can no except you because you have green eyes we only take blue's'' :rolleyes:

[Kfamr]

That's so stupid not hiring someone because there freaking lip is peirced how pathetic... what next... ''Im sorry but we can no except you because you have green eyes we only take blue's'' :rolleyes:


I'm not going to bother with the original post but an employer has EVERY right not to hire someone for this reason. It certainly is not stupid.

I am a fan of body modifications but there is a time and place. A professional working environment certainly isn't the time or place. Now, if you'd like to work at a tattoo parlor, have at it!

[sasvermont]

I cannot tell you how ticked off some of these posts are getting me......and I will not allow myself to share my thoughts beyond just saying that I think it is time for Karen to step in and change something about who gets to post here and how old they need to be........ I don't know if age is really the problem here. The ignore thing only works so far.

I just am so fed up with lousy spelling and horribly constructed paragraphs of nothing but blabber.

I am very, very close to staying away from this place entirely. It was never like this before.

Such childish crap going on.

Karen, please. Give some of these morons the boot!

[catnapper]

If Alicia wanted to do those things yes it was her choice,

That's so stupid not hiring someone because there freaking lip is peirced how pathetic... what next... ''Im sorry but we can no except you because you have green eyes we only take blue's'' :rolleyes:
I have to disagree with you there. Companies spend lots of money each year surveying customer opinions, and customers have told many companies that they want to see clean, neat employees without tattoos or piercings. If you don't want to worry about taking out your piercings, then work at a place that promotes that look (example: Hot Topic).

This will not be the last time in your life that your looks will determine your job and how others see you. Remember the "old" movie Working Girl? Melanie Griffith had big 80's hair and dressed in tight clothes. She changed her look, and next thing you know she got the respect she wanted.

The hard fact is people judge you by your look, your words, your attitude, and your actions. If you feel everything is going wrong in your life right now, look inwards first then see if its something you can change. If its not, then you need to adapt to whatever circumstances life gave you and rise above it.

[Argranade]

The hard fact is people judge you by your look, your words, your attitude, and your actions. If you feel everything is going wrong in your life right now, look inwards first then see if its something you can change. If its not, then you need to adapt to whatever circumstances life gave you and rise above it.

That's the problem people only see what's on the outside & not the inside.

I like to wear black alot, sometime's people give me good looks then other time's it looks like there going to start getting mad at me, I have tried changing my colours more now so I won't get those looks.

I realy don't want to change my self for other people, I think thats silly.

It's not fair because of some tatoo's or piercings that young people can't get a job they want in life or would enjoy, In a way I find it very offensive because I would like a few tatoos when I get a bit older.

[JenBKR]

It's not fair because of some tatoo's or piercings that young people can't get a job they want in life or would enjoy, In a way I find it very offensive because I would like a few tatoos when I get a bit older.

Unfortunately, life is not fair. That's a hard lesson to learn. However, employeers have every right to not hire you because of piercings or tattoos. It is something that you just have to consider when you get the piercings and tattoos. Employeers want a professional looking environment, and in order to get that they need a professional looking staff. That's just life.

[Argranade]

Unfortunately, life is not fair. That's a hard lesson to learn. However, employeers have every right to not hire you because of piercings or tattoos. It is something that you just have to consider when you get the piercings and tattoos. Employeers want a professional looking environment, and in order to get that they need a professional looking staff. That's just life.
True

Know what's weird,

The Wal-mart here has workers with coloured hair,Liberty spikes, periced lips ect... so why can't Alicia work there?! it's very strange indeed I don't get it. :confused:

[critter crazy]

Its not that you are being told that you cannot have a tattoo or a piercing, it is just that you have to look at everything before you make this decision. I have 3 tattoos and a piercing and I have chosen to place them in areas where it will not be distasteful, and where they can be hidden if need be. You have to look at the whole picture! Even when joining the army, you are not allowed to have tattoos in certain areas or piercings! It is just the way it is!

[JenBKR]

True

Know what's weird,

The Wal-mart here has workers with coloured hair,Liberty spikes, periced lips ect... so why can't Alicia work there?! is very strange indeed. :confused:

It probably has to do with the managers at that particular Wal-mart. I have never seen any real obvious piercings or tattoos or anything like that at any employees at my local wal-mart...then again, I never really looked so maybe they do and I just never noticed.

[Vela]

Terry and Pam, I am in complete agreement with you both. No one could have said it better.

Buttercup, I'm sorry your having issues in your life. Everyone has them and being rude to people on PT isn't going to help you with yours. It's really not an excuse.


I agree and Alyssa I just wanted to say that for a long time now you have been a productive member of the younger group of people here and I for one want to thank you for being respectful, insightful, and pleasnt to have around.

We have ALL made comments we regret or should never have said, and as long as everyone can apologize and get past it PT can be a pleasant place. There need not be bickering and fighting. If someone says something they shouldn't have, apologize, let it go, and have a more pleasant day. Life is tough enough without having knockdowns on PT trying to see who can be the meanest on a given day.

[critter crazy]

It probably has to do with the managers at that particular Wal-mart. I have never seen any real obvious piercings or tattoos or anything like that at any employees at my local wal-mart...then again, I never really looked so maybe they do and I just never noticed.
Yeah here at ours it is not allowed either! They are even going to a dress code, come January! Blue shirts and Khaki Pants!

[cmayer31]

I was a hiring manager for years and many companies have policy and procedure that lists what is and is not acceptable. In general if a position requires contact with the general public then piercings, not including ear piercings, must be removed or appropriately covered. Tattoos must be covered as well. In some cases the tattoo policy is less strict based on the appropriateness of the tattoo and the location; this is however determined by the manager and specific company.

The issue is that not everyone likes tattoos or piercings. For example, an elderly customer might not want help or to even associate with someone with visible piercings or numerous tattoos. Most restaurants are the same, that's why you'll notice servers with wraps on their arms. They are hiding their tattoos. One of my good friends puts a band-aid over her nose ring every day when she goes to work.

It's just the way it is. There are plenty of positions that are less strict on dress and appearance codes, but you have to find them and often they require more advanced degrees, such as office / research / field positions. Other places have been mentioned such as "trendy" merchandisers that are more than happy to allow piercings and tattoos.

[Edwina's Secretary]

You do not have to change for other people...you must simply accept the consequences of your choice.

The reality is we judge people all the time by the "outside." Suggesting that employers...or people in general not do so is simply silly and possible dangerous.

If I see someone coming down the street with a gun....I don't think I will take the time to find out what is on the inside.

Judging by what you see is a survival skill.

Isn't that what you did in your example? Judging people by your perception of the looks they have when seeing you?

Employers want...and have the right to expect...employees who behave a certain way, can talk and write correctly, can follow direction, etc. They want someone who is capable of performing the job that needs to be done. And that may mean not scaring off the customers.

They don't care what is on the inside. That is for your friends and lovers.

[Husky15]

If Alicia wanted to do those things yes it was her choice,

That's so stupid not hiring someone because there freaking lip is peirced how pathetic... what next... ''Im sorry but we can no except you because you have green eyes we only take blue's'' :rolleyes:

It may sound stupid, but some people see facial piercings as a sign of dirtiness and the manager wouldn't want that. Personally, I love piercings and tattoos, and I know a bunch of people who do too and wouldn't care if they saw someone with a piercing or tattoo in Wal-Mart, but there are also lots who would care.

Better safe than sorry. I mean if I was manager of a place I wouldn't want some person complaining and causing havoc just because one of my employees had a facial piercing.

[Pam]

I realy don't want to change my self for other people, I think thats silly.

It's not fair because of some tatoo's or piercings that young people can't get a job they want in life or would enjoy, In a way I find it very offensive because I would like a few tatoos when I get a bit older.

Sorry but I am not going to cry with you over this. My sister-in-law is a teacher in a school. She teaches gifted and talented kids in special programs. She was told to stop wearing the cross that she always wears around her neck. Did she think it was unjust and wrong? Yes. Did she stop? Yes. She wanted to keep her job. This was not a fashion statement she was making. This was part of who she is, and reflected her faith. I think tatoos and piercings don't even begin to get into that category and that topic probably belongs in the Dog House. :rolleyes:

[Prairie Purrs]

I have only one thing to say, because it's driving me crazy.

"Alot" is not recognized as a word in the English language. What everyone who is using this means to write is "a lot," i.e., two separate words with a space in between.

Thank you. :)

[critter crazy]

Oh my I made a booboo!! Please forgive me!

[MajesticCollies]

alot, alot, alot, alot ok I'm sorry I had to do that. lol:D

[cmayer31]

alot, alot, alot, alot ok I'm sorry I had to do that. lol:D

LOL I was searching for "alot" to see how many times it had been said and then all of a sudden the find next just went crazy on your post. Anyhow, I got a kick out of it. :D

[Prairie Purrs]

alot, alot, alot, alot ok I'm sorry I had to do that. lol:D

Normally I charge for editorial services, but today it's free. ;)

[king2005]

It is & isn't an excuse. As a mature "adult" its not an excuse, but as a "teen" it is an excuse. I was just like you once upon a time & can still be from time to time.

I use to talk to Bri all the time & was wondering why she wasn't on MSN anylonger.. If you ever need to talk let me know eh.

[Anita Cholaine]

Well, it seems like it's time to sit down and start organizing your life...
I know you're having a lot of things going on in your life right now. That is totally understandable, we all have problems, and yes, they can change our mood and the way we act, but you can't use them as an excuse. If you feel that this is the reason why you're acting rude to other people, then it's up to you to change your attitude. No one can really help you on this.

Good luck, and I hope things start getting better.

[kitten645]

As a mature "adult" its not an excuse, but as a "teen" it is an excuse

I don't agree. There's a reason this forum has age limits. Everyone should treat each other with respect. A load of excuses doesn't make up for rudeness. Had buttercup just said "I'm sorry" that would have been the mature polite thing to do.
RE: piercings etc. I myself don't have a problem with most, however it is an employers right to decide what is or isn't acceptable in their establishment. For better or worse, there are people that would go to a Walmart and see a cashier with a nose ring etc and be repulsed and have a negative "shopping experience". That can't be helped. It's the employers right and obligation to their company to do what's best for the company. That's just life. Fair or not.
Buttercup NEEDS to take a PT break if it's causing her additional distress. By her own admission , no one understands "where she's coming from" here, so what benefit does she get from spending time (which could be spend on homework :confused: ) here.

[Corinna]

Ok a bit on peicings and tattoos . they are fine but I don't want to see them if i'm dining any where. As a 3rd generation nurses kid I know how easy and how many times Heppitisis (sp) is caught I don't want my food near that. My son in law is a tattoo artist but he can only do the cleaning of his end after people leave the shop it's up to them.
I work in retail and i want all my customers to feel comfortable, so I dress conservitive and clean. just as I want when I'm the customer. I have no objection with what you do on your own time but don't wait on me in blue spiked hair. i walk out of businesses like that and I have no problem letting management know they lost a sale and why.

[buttercup132]

Ok woah, I did not make this for people to be rude right back at me. I dont get how some of you can complain about me being rude yet you act the exact same way back.. practise what you preach?
I was appologizing for how I was latley. You all say people make mistakes then go on complaining about how I have terrible spelling mistakes!?! I make typos, so dose everyone. And I usually read my posts over to make sure there are no mistakes.
I'm not making excuses about no getting a job at certain places they wont hire me because I "express" myself in a different way.




1.) Go to those English classes...your post contains so many errors...wrong word...grammar, spelling....you need the class far more than lunch with your friends...

Its not that I have bad grammar or anything its mostly constant typos.



3.) Have you apologized to Tim yet? Not given excuses ....APOLOGIZED....said..."I was rude and I am sorry?" No I havent but I will. Thanks for reminding me.


skipping work is not an option I havnt EVER missed a day of work.

Lori I do apologize for being like that to you at first, but I'm not anymore right?
The reason why I was before is becasuse of the breeding you did and I held that against you. I judged you by your past actions instead of getting ot know you now.

D&D I think your post was most meaningful
it actually hit me the most.

Russian Blue thank you for putting it into kind words.

I think what I will do for now is still come on PT but maybe not post.

Or try and control myself to only post on threads that I can have something positive to say.

Thank you for those who pmed me with positive things, those who pmed me saying rude things I dont know what your problem is, ou were rude enough to me on here I dont see why you have to also pm me being rude. I hope you feel better now that you yelled at someone a lot younger then you.

[finn's mom]

Or try and control myself to only post on threads that I can have something positive to say.



Now, that sounds like a plan. Or at least try to use tact, a little compassion, speak from your heart, but, remember there is almost always a nicer way to say something to get your point across. That's something many people could learn from. Not just in Pet Talk, either, but, in every day life where you are face to face with people.

And, just as a note, I find it sad when children speak disrespectfully to their peers and especially to their elders (and, yes, that may be old fashioned, but, it's how I feel). But, what I find fantastically tiring and disappointing is when adults respond on identical levels. It's actually pathetic to see some of the replies in pet talk (and some of the things I hear daily) that come from the keyboards (and mouths) of grown women.

[dogzr#1]

Ok, time for me to put my two (or maybe ten) cents in. Oh, and I better warn you, as I tend to write books. :p

Alicia, you are what, 16? You have only two years until you are considered an adult and the behavior you are showing is not very...'adulty'. It's time for you to start growing up. Skipping school, getting into fights, tatoos, piercings. Now, if I may be so bold to inject my professional opinion. (<---Alyssa, you may or may not recognize that. ;) )

Those two people who have been harassing you just need to be put on ignore. That's why it's called that. So you can IGNORE them. If they continue to harass you somehow, just contact Karen and Paul and I'm sure they will take care of it. I think I know what one of the PTers are. Yes, I agree, they can be annoying at times, but most of the time I just ignore their posts. Maybe you should do the same.

You shouldn't be skipping a class just to eat lunch with friends! No offense, but maybe that's why your spelling and grammar skills aren't that great. I am aware that my grammar isn't the absolute best and yes, we all make mistakes, but I'm just saying that maybe if you go to that English class more often, you could improve your grammar. Do your parents know you're skipping that class? I know if my mom found out I was skipping a class, she would personally kill me.

This is just my opinion, but I knew if I were to see a person serving me or cashing me out with a visible piercing(s), I would think they looked unprofessional. I'm sure it doesn't take much of a profession to take orders or to scan items, but you must have some sort of decency and care about the first impressions of others to take care choosing piercings/tatoos that cannot be seen. And being a kid doesn't help matters any. Most people think very lowly of you if they see a 16 year old kid with visible tatoos and piercings and may think bad of your parents as they are the ones that let you get the tats/piercings in the first place. Some people may be offended with your tatoos and perhaps may go complain to the store/restaraunt.

Also, some newer members may not know of the other sections. Give them a break. I'm sure when you first joined, you didn't post all in the right section. Yes, they are in bold, but most people just stay in their section. (and I'm going to use Tim as an example here) Tim mostly posts in dog general so perhaps he didn't know of the other sections and he probably didn't have a reason to look elsewhere other than Dog General. No need to be so rude towards him. Cut the guy some slack.

All in all, you seriously have to get your priorities straightened out. Remember, school/education first, friends/family/pets second. I know it may sound rude to put them second, but they aren't the ones that can finish college for you and get you a job that will properly house and take care of you.


(see, I always happen to write a book! :o )

[dab_20]

I agree with most everyone here. Some of those problems that your going through could be prevented. Like how your behind in homework. Having lunch with friends should not be a reason for you to skip class. You are upset that your behind on homework, but YOU are the one who didn't go to class. Spend more time on your homework then on PT, then once you get caught up you can be on here as much as you want- without any worries!

And there are no excuses for being rude. I understand you are trying to apologize, and that's great of you. I am going through alot of things right now, too, and I try my hardest to not take it out on others. It helps to talk to someone about it, whether it's a friend, your parents, a counsler, etc.

The PTrs who are giving you a hard time, just ignore them! You can put them on your ignore list or talk to Karen about it.

I left PT when I first joined because I was upset that people replied to my posts something other then I wanted to hear. I was defensive because I just didn't want to hear other opinions, or rather the truth. I took a good look at my posts and realized I was being very rude and immature. I'm not saying you are... it just sometimes helps to take a break.

Some new PTrs may not know or understand what the different sections are for. That's no reason to get angry, we all were somewhat confused when we first joined. It takes a bit of time to learn.

Well, I know I pretty much repeated what many others said so I'll stop here. Hope you feel better and get everything worked out.

[Edwina's Secretary]

Good you apologized to Tim. Stay in that English class.

[Kfamr]

It's funny how often people complain, for lack of better term, about proper grammar/English/etc. I never knew how bad I was until I started my GED class. I did well, however, I have a lot of room for improvement.

I've always been complimented on my way with words, yet I need a lot of work!

[Alysser]

if I may be so bold to inject my professional opinion. (<---Alyssa, you may or may not recognize that. ;) )

:D :D You know me well, Monica. :cool:

[Husky15]

I have only one thing to say, because it's driving me crazy.

"Alot" is not recognized as a word in the English language. What everyone who is using this means to write is "a lot," i.e., two separate words with a space in between.

Thank you. :)

You're right, though. It's a habit I try to break. I'm a grammar freak lol...

[Vela]

Buttercup, as long as you realize there are problems you can work on for yourself in how you respond to others, then that is a great first step. I don't understand the need to PM anyone with harmful things, it doesn't help, so I don't know why anyone woudl do that...the best thing to do is just ignore those, they aren't gonig to help you or the sender.

There are some days when we ALL come out sounding snippy and we all have many reasons. I hope you are able to work out some of the issues you have personally, and are able to enjoy the board more with a more positive attitude. I have been gulity of being snippy before but I always try to apologize when I do it, and as long as you do that with sincerity, I'm sure most people are more than willing to forgive and get over it.

[Muddy4paws]

That really annoys me when people correct other, some people have learning difficulties I'm bad at spelling and grammer and I cant help it, It knocks my confidence to know it bothers people so much

[Karen]

That really annoys me when people correct other, some people have learning difficulties I'm bad at spelling and grammer and I cant help it, It knocks my confidence to know it bothers people so much


We do try to make allowances for learning difficulties, but sometimes we know it is just a matter of rushing, or not caring - that's what we try to correct.

Don't feel badly, Muddy4paws, we just ask that people honestly try. In the case of students especially, I know that paying more attention to their typing here is good practice for schoolwork later. Forming good communication habits is helpful in almost every career field as well.

[Blue_Frog]

--- again with the REALLY long posts ... i've seriously got to conform to like a 300 word maximum. sorry bout that, i get verbose a lot of the time! ---


Buttercup -- I've thought about your thread here since you posted it, and have been trying to think up what I want to say. Basically, to sum it up ...

You remind me sooo much of my younger sister when she was your age! (well, except for the horse parts) :) I'm going to explain her to you a little, and see if this helps...

When she was younger, she would fight with her friends -constantly- and she was unhappy a lot of the time. She missed a lot of school, fought with our parents all the time, and fought with me as well. My sister is a passionate and vocal person, and often people just don't get her. She isn't the most tactful either, and has often rubbed people the wrong way. She has covered herself in tattoos, piercings, and dresses in black, so getting a conventional 9-5-work-in-the-office-cubicle-world will likely never be for her.

But ... she graduated from college, and now works as an Adult Day Program Coordinator for Social Services, and the old folks --- THEY LOVE HER! Shes passionate about what she does, and is a very vocal animal rights activist.

So, I guess what i'm getting at is that there is a place for you in life, no matter what. How you deal with the people around you will dictate in a lot of ways how they deal with you as well. My sister has lost -many- friends over the years, and has gone though many many hard times. If you are rude, and hard to be around, then you will have to be prepared for people to be rude and abrasive back - it is human nature. My sister has gone through the same things, and it is her choice to act the way she does, and has accepted the fact that not everyone will like her because of it.

Because of how she dresses and is pierced and tattoo'd, she HAS limited her work types - she will never work in an office like I do, but she has found something she loves to do. She was lucky, in that where she works and the people she works with accepts her for who she is -- not everywhere or everyone would be willing to give you the same acceptance (judging by some of the responses to your tattooing here). That is also human nature.

Even with tattoos, theres a lot of places that it doesn't matter as much - IT departments, a lot of social work places, Art and Graphic Design, Marketing, and more progressive companies to name a few. Dealing one-on-one with customers directly will likely -not- happen with heavy tattooing though, so you're limiting a lot of the kinds of jobs you might be able to get dealing with the public. Also, getting a job with tattoos is more likely in a large city where people are more used to that (like Toronto), than smaller towns might be.

I'm not going to preach on the school thing - that seems to have been covered already by other posters - the only thing I would recommend is to learn how to learn - school is good for that. It will help you once you are in the work-a-day-world, since every day you will likely have to learn new things and apply them to your job.

My sister and I are almost completely opposite, and we've had a lot of differences over the years, but we love each other, and I've accepted who she she is both physically and emotionally. I hope that the people in your life (family, friends, etc.) accept you for you as well.

Now, I'm not saying that certain behaviours, or being rude, is by any means ever a cool thing to do. All I'm getting at is that you will need to be prepared to deal with the people around you reacting the same way back if you
-choose- to continue with the actions and behaviours. No one else can be responsible for you but YOU.




... and since the Tattooing thing has come up quite often in replies, heres a story about my sister and tattooing, and people being judging of her and it. I worked in a Toy Store in a large mall near Toronto for about 5 years. I am clean cut, dressed conservatively, and was working cash. My sister and 2 of her male friends came into the store - spikes, dreadlocks, black and purple hair, piercings, tattoos, you name it. There were 2 women at my cash - about 40-50 - they look at my sister, and then one says to the other "Oh, look at that girl - she must have a lot of problems to look that way. I bet her mother has issues, and probabally never spent time with her". I turned to the woman and said "Actually, OUR mother was home with us until we were 10 years old. Thats MY sister that you're talking about, and shes perfectly fine thank you. Heres' your change, have a nice day". They turned red and left the store.

The moral? People will judge you behind your back based on how you look and act. They may also judge your family and the people you hang around with based on your outside appearance. But for the people doing the judging well --- you never know the whole story, so maybe think about it before saying something rude.

[buttercup132]

Blue Frog - WOW your sister seems EXACTLY like me!

Is she stubborn too?
I KNOW that I will never get a office job, I couldnt handle being in a enviroment like that. No effence to people who work in one I just think Id be bored stiff, I hate not being up and moving or constantly and doing hands on things.

Ive already been offered a apprentiship (sp?) at my current job , although I am going to graduate from high school. Ive only had one rude comment about my peircings in my current job placing and it was a customer. She looked at my peircing and said she felt like she was going to be sick.. I just walked away but the owner of the store said "Ya well maybe thats her way of showing her "wild" side " (because they all think I'm very quiet at work). All my co workers are so "into" that kind of stuff too though. They arent covered in tattoos or peircings but they do like them and support them. Wic is another reason why I love my job. But they only stay open till 2 or 1 and that finishing up the clipping and waiting for pick ups. I only bath them and I am done by 11-1 (the time varies). And I need more hours that is why I need another job.

[Blue_Frog]

Originally Posted by buttercup132:
Blue Grof - WOW your sister seems EXACTLY like me!
Is she stubborn too?
Yes. We called it the 'Oma Syndrome' (she took after my grandmother) - It has always been 'her way or the wrong way'. Shes open to calm discussions, but if you get her back up then she won't listen at all, and tends to keep an arguement going past when it should have ended. She got a lot better when she started seeing that some people were just trying to get her going - she stopped paying attention to them, realized that it was a no-win situation, and stopped listening/talking to them at all. She realized it was saving her a lot of heartaches just to let some things go.


Ive already been offered a apprentiship (sp?) at my current job , although I am going to graduate from high school.
Good! - graduating High School is definately a great plan (which means going to English Class ya'know ;) ). Theres absolutely nothing at all wrong with an apprenticeship - and from the sounds of it a hands-on job is the best for you. Having your High School diploma will keep your options open for later in life, if you decide to do something different.


Ive only had one rude comment about my peircings in my current job placing and it was a customer. She looked at my peircing and said she felt like she was going to be sick.. I just walked away but the owner of the store said "Ya well maybe thats her way of showing her "wild" side " (because they all think I'm very quiet at work).
And thats the best response - if someone wants to be insulting to you, walk away. Treat it as beneath you to stoop to their level - its just people trying to get you going. I'm glad that your boss stood up for you too, and you proved yourself valuable and responsible to him by not insulting a paying customer. Dealing with customers is the -best- way to learn to curb some of the things you really really want to say. When you can smile at someone and help them, even if they're rude and belligerent, and say 'thank you' out loud (and all kinds of nasty things in your head ;)) then you're ahead of the game :) Maybe your boss could let you do some extra work, like answering the phones or dealing with the customers a little more to get that kind of experience?


But they only stay open till 2 or 1 and that finishing up the clipping and waiting for pick ups. I only bath them and I am done by 11-1 (the time varies). And I need more hours that is why I need another job.
Have you talked to your boss about getting a few more hours? Maybe theres something you can do to help with cleanup, or miscellaneous other tasks? Just don't overdo the working while you're in school though - graduate first, and worry about the extra work second. Don't let the work get in the way of schooling right now - you've got lots of years ahead of you for working, so get the basics done first! :)

Maybe sitting down and setting a budget would be helpful to know where all your money goes - try saving all your receipts (even from a pack of gum!) for a month, and add them all up into a spreadsheet. That way, you would have enough money for your phone and misc. other things that come up.

[Suki Wingy]

Alicia, just a word of caution on Walgreens, Walmart, and similar retail jobs- Mine threw me into depression, it was horrible, it dehuminized me, and I got SO sick of the constantly rude customers coming in half dressed while I had to wear dress clothes. Where I work now is a museum at a historic farm. Are there any places like that around you? I have red hair and wear paperclips in my ears a lot and wear pink crocks and jeans and they could care less. Then again, I much prefer the office type job than working with customers and such. If you like kids is there a Khol Children's Museum around you? They hire highschool kids a lot and pay well. I'd also try a bowling alley. I seem to remember some girls working at ours who had eyebrow piercings.

[buttercup132]

Alicia, just a word of caution on Walgreens, Walmart, and similar retail jobs- Mine threw me into depression, it was horrible, it dehuminized me, and I got SO sick of the constantly rude customers coming in half dressed while I had to wear dress clothes. Where I work now is a museum at a historic farm. Are there any places like that around you? I have red hair and wear paperclips in my ears a lot and wear pink crocks and jeans and they could care less. Then again, I much prefer the office type job than working with customers and such. If you like kids is there a Khol Children's Museum around you? They hire highschool kids a lot and pay well. I'd also try a bowling alley. I seem to remember some girls working at ours who had eyebrow piercings.Thanks, I dont think I have any of those. I live in Canada so the stores varry by alot.

[Cataholic]

I KNOW that I will never get a office job, I couldnt handle being in a enviroment like that. No effence to people who work in one I just think Id be bored stiff, I hate not being up and moving or constantly and doing hands on things.[/color][/b]


What does that really mean to you? **Most** people work in an office enviroment, and are thankful for it. No outhouses for potty breaks, a warmth in the winter, a colder environment in the summer, a phone for emergencies, etc. So, when you say you KNOW (though at your age, KNOW is a pretty strong word) you will never get an office job, I wonder what your plans are?

Even in the outside job market, post office workers- sometimes, construction workers- sometimes, landscaping, field engineering- most times, these people aren't really 'up and moving constantly', and still have to comply with rules, regulations, authority, and interacting with the public. I would imagine, too, that they get bored stiff, too! (Funny, I work in an office, and can't really think of many times that I have been bored stiff.).

You are young, and entitled to your dreams (as are we older folks). But, I wonder if you have really put any thought whatsoever into your 'five years out' plan.

For tatoos, piercings, hair colour, etc., feel free to treat your body as you see fit. I wouldn't hire you- which doesn't mean you are or are not a 'good person' or 'good employee', but, you don't project the right image for my economic well being. Most things turn on the almighty dollar (or euro, or peso). If your looks would turn away business, I can't afford to have you here with me. It isn't discriminatory, it is economics.

[BC_MoM]

Wow, Cataholic, take it easy .. I had my plans for my future by the time I was 15. Age means


NOTHING.

There are HUNDREDS of other options for jobs out there that aren't in the office that Alicia could EASILY get hired for.

It sounds like you were hurt by her office comment.

[Muddy4paws]

What does that really mean to you? **Most** people work in an office enviroment, and are thankful for it. No outhouses for potty breaks, a warmth in the winter, a colder environment in the summer, a phone for emergencies, etc. So, when you say you KNOW (though at your age, KNOW is a pretty strong word) you will never get an office job, I wonder what your plans are?

Even in the outside job market, post office workers- sometimes, construction workers- sometimes, landscaping, field engineering- most times, these people aren't really 'up and moving constantly', and still have to comply with rules, regulations, authority, and interacting with the public. I would imagine, too, that they get bored stiff, too! (Funny, I work in an office, and can't really think of many times that I have been bored stiff.).

You are young, and entitled to your dreams (as are we older folks). But, I wonder if you have really put any thought whatsoever into your 'five years out' plan.

For tatoos, piercings, hair colour, etc., feel free to treat your body as you see fit. I wouldn't hire you- which doesn't mean you are or are not a 'good person' or 'good employee', but, you don't project the right image for my economic well being. Most things turn on the almighty dollar (or euro, or peso). If your looks would turn away business, I can't afford to have you here with me. It isn't discriminatory, it is economics.


I can see where you are coming from but I do the same job as Alicia, Im more experience with the actual grooming but I can definatly see what she means, Im 18 years old and I cant ever see myself sitting in an office again. Hand on heart.
I've tried other jobs but I love the busy rush that comes with dog grooming! If you are used to something like that then you really do miss it, I know from experience and I was so depressed when I had to leave my old job, I worked on reception somewhere else and I did find it boring but only because Im so used to being active and to go from getting soaked, bitten, scratched etc for most of the day to sitting behind a computer all day is a big change! I cannot see myself doing any other job because I love the job Im in, Alicia should be proud, I've seen a few people try out to do dog grooming but they cant handle the pace and the constant go, She should be proud that she wants to carry on in a very demanding job.

I dont mean to put you down in anyway, I just thought I would explain what I think Alicia means :)

[mugsy]

What does that really mean to you? **Most** people work in an office enviroment, and are thankful for it. No outhouses for potty breaks, a warmth in the winter, a colder environment in the summer, a phone for emergencies, etc. So, when you say you KNOW (though at your age, KNOW is a pretty strong word) you will never get an office job, I wonder what your plans are?

Even in the outside job market, post office workers- sometimes, construction workers- sometimes, landscaping, field engineering- most times, these people aren't really 'up and moving constantly', and still have to comply with rules, regulations, authority, and interacting with the public. I would imagine, too, that they get bored stiff, too! (Funny, I work in an office, and can't really think of many times that I have been bored stiff.).

You are young, and entitled to your dreams (as are we older folks). But, I wonder if you have really put any thought whatsoever into your 'five years out' plan.

For tatoos, piercings, hair colour, etc., feel free to treat your body as you see fit. I wouldn't hire you- which doesn't mean you are or are not a 'good person' or 'good employee', but, you don't project the right image for my economic well being. Most things turn on the almighty dollar (or euro, or peso). If your looks would turn away business, I can't afford to have you here with me. It isn't discriminatory, it is economics.

Here! Here! Johanna! As a new business owner, excessive tats and piercings will turn my customers off...I promise. Mike has 2 holes in his left ear and tats on both arms above the short sleeve line....by my request.

[Cataholic]

Wow, Cataholic, take it easy .. I had my plans for my future by the time I was 15. Age means


NOTHING.

There are HUNDREDS of other options for jobs out there that aren't in the office that Alicia could EASILY get hired for.

It sounds like you were hurt by her office comment.


Hurt by her comment? Are you serious? Wow. I must go re-read my post. I don't think that could be any further from what I meant. I was actually confused by her comments, and wanted to know what she had planned for her future.

I don't know what you mean by age, and how it means nothing. That you had your plans (I don't know what they are, but, I guess I would presume they are in line with hers?), at 15, and what that meant in relation to my post. Really, your post came so out of left field I am kind of stunned. I must have hit a nerve with you, big time. Sorry about that.

I am not sure what hundreds of jobs that Alicia (assuming again that that is her name, as I just don't seem to be as embroiled in this as you might think) could get you are referring to. I saw someone suggest she apply at a bowling alley. Is that what you are thinking of, also? If so, what kind of sustainable employment is that? Sure, maybe at 15 or 16 it is 'fun', but, seems kind of limiting to me.

Wow...even as I finish this post, I am really shocked at your response, and what emotions I must have brought up. I do apologize. I can tell you I didn't mean it in the way you took it.



I dont mean to put you down in anyway, I just thought I would explain what I think Alicia means :)

Why would I feel put down in anyway? I am chuckling here....really.

[My Peanuts]

I'm not going to attack you but you need to understand that every single person on PT can make a list like yours. It's no excuse to snap at people. We ALL have problems and stressful situations.

God forbid you have to deal with something like deaths in the family, divorce or even cancer. There are PTers dealing with all that and they are as sweet as pie. This list is a bunch of excuses.

Also, the thing about people posting in the wrong sections, GET OVER IT. It's really not a big deal. People make mistakes. Of all the things you listed, that one makes me laugh. If something like that really bothers you then EVERYTHING must bother you.

You have problems, I have problems. Please try to work out your problems with the people you have them with and don't take it out on innocent people.

[JenBKR]

Ya know, I honestly thought I had it all figured out at 15 and 16 too. I also did not want an office job, sounded boring. I thought I had all the answers......then I graduated high school and started college. Sometimes life gets in the way of plans. Guess where I work now? Yep, in an office...and I LOVE it! I never pictured myself working in an office, but a few unexpected twists and turns happened along the way and I landed here. All I am trying to say is don't put yourself in a pigeon hole, but spread your wings. Life has lots in store for you, and honestly at 15 you don't know what's going to happen. Heck, I'm 27 and I still have no clue where I'm headed, and I'm ok with that now. Actually, until the end of my senior year in high school, I had not planned on attending college at all.....then I got a job at a fast food restaurant and I said NO WAY am I living like this the rest of my life! Trust me, you have tons of options and opportunity ahead of you, don't shut anything out because it might sound boring to you.....I used to think that stability, putting down roots, was just boring. I now have everything I never wanted and I couldn't be happier. :)

[buttercup132]

What does that really mean to you? **Most** people work in an office enviroment, and are thankful for it. No outhouses for potty breaks, a warmth in the winter, a colder environment in the summer, a phone for emergencies, etc. So, when you say you KNOW (though at your age, KNOW is a pretty strong word) you will never get an office job, I wonder what your plans are?

Even in the outside job market, post office workers- sometimes, construction workers- sometimes, landscaping, field engineering- most times, these people aren't really 'up and moving constantly', and still have to comply with rules, regulations, authority, and interacting with the public. I would imagine, too, that they get bored stiff, too! (Funny, I work in an office, and can't really think of many times that I have been bored stiff.).

You are young, and entitled to your dreams (as are we older folks). But, I wonder if you have really put any thought whatsoever into your 'five years out' plan.

For tatoos, piercings, hair colour, etc., feel free to treat your body as you see fit. I wouldn't hire you- which doesn't mean you are or are not a 'good person' or 'good employee', but, you don't project the right image for my economic well being. Most things turn on the almighty dollar (or euro, or peso). If your looks would turn away business, I can't afford to have you here with me. It isn't discriminatory, it is economics.
Its a groomers. We have heating,air conditioning, a inside bathroom and 3 phones. The thing is they offered to do my schooling for FREE. I'm not going to pass that up. Its not some crappy low pay job either and is a carreer. Once again no effence to people who work here but its not like working at a grocerie store. Working in a grocerie store isnt really a career this is.

[Cataholic]

Its a groomers. We have heating,air conditioning, a inside bathroom and 3 phones. The thing is they offered to do my schooling for FREE. I'm not going to pass that up. Its not some crappy low pay job either and is a carreer. Once again no effence to people who work here but its not like working at a grocerie store. Working in a grocerie store isnt really a career this is.

That does sound like a plan to me. And, paying for your schooling is a huge benefit. And, thank you for explaining your position, rather than attacking anyone.

[Miss Z]

I've come into this a little late, hopefully the arguements are ceasing now...

Alicia, I think you took a brave step to make a formal announcement and an explanation, from your own point of view, about your situation. I admire you for that and it takes someone with guts to be prepared for the whole variety of posts that will follow. So well done you.

Second, although PT can offer advice and words, we can't do any more than that. Don't let yourself suffer, hun. Get to those classes and give them everything you've got and show everyone you can cope with whatever comes your way. Outlook on life is the key, and everyone respects that, PTers, friends and family, and heck most of all employers! You can only make fire with the sticks you have, and my dear I know with a bit of elbow grease you can start the best darn blaze you can ;)

You know what's right in your head, I can tell you do, you just don't always feel like following it, and that's perfectly understandable, especially being a teenager and all the side-effects which come with that. Don't let other things get you down, I suggest you take a good hot bath, eat a big bar of your favourite chocolate, and go to bed tonight thinking, "Hey world, here I come!"

:D

[BC_MoM]

Hurt by her comment? Are you serious? Wow. I must go re-read my post. I don't think that could be any further from what I meant. I was actually confused by her comments, and wanted to know what she had planned for her future.

I don't know what you mean by age, and how it means nothing. That you had your plans (I don't know what they are, but, I guess I would presume they are in line with hers?), at 15, and what that meant in relation to my post. Really, your post came so out of left field I am kind of stunned. I must have hit a nerve with you, big time. Sorry about that.

I am not sure what hundreds of jobs that Alicia (assuming again that that is her name, as I just don't seem to be as embroiled in this as you might think) could get you are referring to. I saw someone suggest she apply at a bowling alley. Is that what you are thinking of, also? If so, what kind of sustainable employment is that? Sure, maybe at 15 or 16 it is 'fun', but, seems kind of limiting to me.

Wow...even as I finish this post, I am really shocked at your response, and what emotions I must have brought up. I do apologize. I can tell you I didn't mean it in the way you took it.



Why would I feel put down in anyway? I am chuckling here....really.

I think you've been stuck in the office too long, lol... Yes, there are HUNDREDS of jobs that are not "in-office" jobs out there. I don't appreciate the sarcasm of working at a bowling alley.

[Anita Cholaine]

Alicia, I totally understand you about not seeing yourself in office jobs. It happens the same to me. I would get an office job only as a last option, but I know that I wouldn't be happy at all in one. Maybe I'll change my opinion in some years, who knows...
It's really good that you explained your situation, and I'm glad to know about your job in the groomers. It sounds like a big oportunity, so I wish you the best ;)

[Husky15]

Alicia,

I understand what you mean with the whole office thing. Office work is not for everyone, that's why there are other job opportunities out there. I think it's great that you're commited to your dog grooming job, and I also think it's great that you're not afraid to be yourself and express yourself in your own way. I don't think you should be a whole different person just to get a job, you must be true to yourself, but sometimes you just got to compromise. It is difficult, but it works.

It is also a great benefit that the groomers are paying for your school. I wouldn't pass that up either! :p

[Alysser]

I agree and Alyssa I just wanted to say that for a long time now you have been a productive member of the younger group of people here and I for one want to thank you for being respectful, insightful, and pleasnt to have around.

Vela, thank you. You have helped with alot of peoples problems and always give wonderful advice. :)

Sorry, I never saw this. :o