Depression

[catnapper]

Ok, after weeks of saying I'm slipping into depression, I finally realized, I'm no longer slipping, I'm there. I don't need to count off all my symptoms to you all, I'm sure you've noticed a change in me the past few months.

I decided today that I'm going to meet with my doctor to discuss possibly taking some antidepressants. I know a lot of you have experience with the different drugs out there, so I wanted input before I went to the doctor to make sure I'm not put on something that has given other people bad side effects. I'm not talking about side effects like headache or diarrhea.... I'm sure you know what other side efects I'm talking about.

Nobody has to say which drugs they are currently on if they don't want to -- please PM me if you're not comfortable telling the world which medicine you take.

I was on somethign 3 years ago for anxiety. Maybe it is all just anxiety leading to the depression. It worked wonders for me right away and I felt like my old self. I want to be me again. This blah person who takes naps every day and is quick to flare up is getting on my nerves ;) I want to be passionate again. I want to feel hope again. I want my memory back! (LOL) I just want to be ME again, and this person I've been the last few months isn't me. All I know is I'm in a bad depression right now. I know the symptoms from the last two times I got this low... right after grandmom died and right as my last job ended.

[Soapets]

I take a combination of Lexapro and Strattera. The worst thing about antidepressant medication is that it takes so long to reach it's full effectivenesss--4-6 weeks. I was told that if one kind didn't work, not to give up because sometimes it takes a few trials to get the right medication, or combination of medications, for you. But I whole-heartedly believe in them, and they have made a HUGE difference in my life, for the better. I will be on them for the rest of my life because of a brain chemical imbalance, and I am very thankful for them. Anyone who has never experienced it, can't understand it. Don't let anyone tell you that "you shouldn't take them because you'll get addicted to them", etc. Lots of people will say they don't believe in these kinds of medications (Tom Cruise, for instance!), but then they apparently have never experienced true depression that is caused by a brain chemical imbalance.

I hope you get started on one that is effective for you right away, without having to go through a lot of trial and error first. But don't get too discouraged, the right medication or combination of medications IS out there!

Good luck!

Deb

[Jadapit]

I've never taken any antidepressants but my husbands has. The doctor put him on Wellbutrin he was trying to stop smoking at the time, its supposed to help take the edge off. He hated it. He said it made him feel very angry all the time. But I know it does work for a lot of people. I'm sure your doctor will work with you and find what's best for you.

I'm sorry to here you are feeling so down. I hope you feel better soon. You will be in my thoughts. (((Hugs)))

[caseysmom]

My brother was on anti depressants when he died (we think) I am still waiting for the autopsy report to see if they complicated his condition. So I guess I am wary of them right at the moment.

[jenluckenbach]

The first medicine I tried was Lexapro. It did work, but it stopped working. :(
The second medicine (the one I am on now) is Zoloft. The dosage was raised a few times when it seemed to becoming less effective. When it worked, it worked great! But I am going to ask for yet a third attempt since I have been feeling super bad myself lately. :(
I too just want to be the happy-go-lucky person that I know lives deep inside me. Not this heavy hearted person I have been lately.
Unfortunatley my Dr. appt. isn't for another month. :(


But sheesh. I sure don't want to get a medication that makes me feel angry! That is the LAST thing I need on top of everything. :(

Good luck catnapper getting a proper medication.

[catnapper]

Lexapro! thats the anxiety med I was on 3 years ago. I tworked almost immediately, but like Jen, it faded within 6 months til the point where I didn't feel it worked at all. I just weaned off of it at that point since I left he job that caused all the anxiety and depression.

Thanks guys - its good to hear alternate ideas.

[JenBKR]

((((hugs)))) I'm sorry that you are going through a difficult time, but I'm glad that you are seeking help. Typically anti-depressants are extremely helpful once you figure out what works best for you. It may take some trial and error, which may require some patience on your part. Lots of times people have the most problems with anti-depressants when they can't find the right one to work for them or they have been on the same one for a long time and the effectiveness wears off some. I am currently on Effexor, which works great for me, but the withdrawal is hell. If you miss even one pill, you will experience withdrawal, and it's horrible. I have heard some things about Wellbutrin too, that people have had problems with it. It really just depends on what works for you. Good luck, and keep us updated!


EDIT: Just read that you were on Lexapro before, Effexor is very similar to Lexapro so maybe you might have better luck with that one....just don't miss a pill!

[Pembroke_Corgi]

I don't have experience with any particular drug, but I'd encourage you to seek counseling (if your insurance covers it) as well as an antidepressant. The drug will improve your mood, but some kind of counseling will help in the long run, too. I think together they work best. You mentioned anxiety, this is often present with depression and if you think you may suffer from both maybe you could mention that to your doctor- there might be a drug to treat both. I'm sorry you're feeling low. Good luck at the doctor's, and I hope things start looking up for you soon.

[MomToThree]

I was on Effexor, it worked wonders for me. I love it. It made me, ME again. My only problem with it and all medications is, I forget to take them. It gave me the energy that I never thought I had or forgot I had. It made me happy, and I was smiling again.

My doctor first put me on Wellbutrin. I am a smoker and he said it would help me slow down on my smoking. It made me smoke more I noticed. He figured that wasn't the right medication for me.

I don't really know what all you are going through but if you ever need to talk I am here. I understand how you feel.

[dukedogsmom]

I would also suggest therapy, as well. I can't remember what I used for a short time but it seemed to help. Later, I was given Welbutrin and didn't like it at all because it sped up my heart. I only took one pill. Therapy will help you a lot. They say you need both for the medication to work as well as possible.

[Catty1]

My mom asked me: "If you have a medication, why do you need counselling?"

I answered, "Mom, let's assume for the sake of argument I was born with depressive illness(which I was). I have to relearn and unlearn a lifetime of attitudes, thinking and reactions that have resulted from living with this untreated illness. A pill won't do that."

Sure makes it EASIER though!

Will PM you with more...HUGS HUGS HUGS

[ashleycat]

I was on lexapro, and switched to celexa. The only thing I noticed is that I actually get bored now. I used to be just fine staring at the wall.

It did help for a week or so, as far as having a lil more engergy to clean house. But mine wore off faster than yalls :( At times I feel.. maybe I'm just ment to not be happy.

But really.. I know I can be happy, and I think the only thing that might cure me is to go back to my home state to be closer to my mom. And what few friends I had.

I'm all alone here except for the people that live in my house. I really miss my mom.

But my husband doesn't want to move back. NOt for a couple years anyways. But at the rate my depression is taking me, I don't think I can wait that long. I might end up leaving and telling him that if he loves me, he will follow. He works for Walgreens as a pharmacist, he can get a job easily there. But he says it's all the hassle of moving out of state, selling house and re-exam for his pharm license.

I'm sorry Catnapper! Ihope things get better for you! Depression really sux

[kimlovescats]

As I have shared here many times in the past, I have Major Depressive Illness and also recently diagnosed with Bi-Polar II Disorder. I have tried many antidepressants through the years, and the one that has worked best has been Celexa. Since my BPII diagnosis, I was also started on Lamictal which helps with anxiety and mood swings as well. I applaud you in recognizing when you need help, and not being afraid or ashamed to ask for it!

You know I am only a phone call away too, right? ;)

HUGS,
Kim

[ashleycat]

I'm on 2o mg of celexa and have been on it for 2 weeks. I'm still waiting to feel better.

[buckner]

I had one doctor who insisted that my depression should eventually be battled with therapy *and* medication. But, for the time being, she prescribed Zoloft. The next doctor I saw (not but two weeks after, but same office) said I didn't even have depression because what I was going through wasn't "real" and I just needed to get over it. Well, I immediately divorced the pediatrician. :)

So, I transfered to my current doctor who I LOVE! He actually listened to me, listened to my problems, listened to what I had to say. It was awesome. And he trusted me taking antidepressants. So, he kept me on Zoloft, and is allowing me to bump myself up every 4-6 weeks in 25mg increments. He went through everything, but all in all, he trusts me to do what's right for me.

So I'm currently on 75mg of Zoloft, and in a few weeks, I'll be bumping up to 100mg. I'm actually doing a lot better on this medication, but bumping it up may make things better. But if it makes things worse, I'll just go back down to 75mg.

On this medication, I can actually wake up without wanting to cry. And go to bed at night, without tears in my eyes. I can talk about my problems without getting over emotional and shutting everyone out. I feel more comfortable in my skin, and I feel more confident. I feel more rational, and I feel more stable. I no longer feel that I'm walking on egg shells around *myself*.

[cyber-sibes]

There are so many types of depressive disorders, find a competent doctor who can properly diagnose you. Lucky me, I inherited the family genes for depressive disorders, so I've had years of experience, haha! will pm you the details.

[PJ's Mom]

I take 40mg of celexa everyday. It only took a week for me to start to feel better and as far as side effects go, the only two I have experienced are being hot all the time and some weight gain.

It works really well for me.

[moosmom]

Depression sucks big time! I've been on all kinds of different meds until I finally found one that works for me. I'm on 37.5 mgs of Paxil. My doctor has put me on Wellbutrin on top of that, but I got suicidal thoughts and was taken off it immediately.

I've found that since I've moved back home with my friends and family, my depression isn't quite as bad, although I still need the Paxil. People who don't have depression, don't understand that it's not as simple as "pulling yourself up by your bootstraps and getting over it". I only WISH it were that easy. As far as Tomkat is concerned, he's a walking chemical imbalance. I have lost all respect for him.

Hang in there Kim. I'd definitely make an appt with the doctor to see if he can put you on something to help get you through the "blue period". Don't forget, you've also got alot on your plate right now.

((((HUGS))))

[ashleycat]

With me it's not a matter of crying all the time. I just developed a quick temper that gets set off by the smallest of things. Somedays I will be fine. Today I got mad at a bowl because it didnt' want to come out of the cabinet like I wanted. I almost thru it. but it was glass so I tried my hardest to calm down. I have a hard time going to sleep because I have tons of random thoughts in my head. Then I don't wanna get out of bed, because I dred taking care of myself. ya know like how you dont want to get in the shower, but once you're in, you don't want to get out?

I keep thinking of how many times I have to eat, shower, brush teeth etc in the next 50+ years that I have left in my life. It's a part of life, but I just want to sleep. I dream of being happy sometimes, but I do have a lot of bad dreams.

And Runner is right there for me to cuddle. And she cuddles me right back. My daighter cuddles sometimes, but she's rather play.

I may be depressed, but I have a TON of love to give. But feel like I can't release it enough and with 2 animals and a child and a "husband" I still feel lonely. So I can relate to those who have TONS of pets.

[K9karen]

I had one doctor who insisted that my depression should eventually be battled with therapy *and* medication. But, for the time being, she prescribed Zoloft. The next doctor I saw (not but two weeks after, but same office) said I didn't even have depression because what I was going through wasn't "real" and I just needed to get over it. Well, I immediately divorced the pediatrician. :)

So, I transfered to my current doctor who I LOVE! He actually listened to me, listened to my problems, listened to what I had to say. It was awesome. And he trusted me taking antidepressants. So, he kept me on Zoloft, and is allowing me to bump myself up every 4-6 weeks in 25mg increments. He went through everything, but all in all, he trusts me to do what's right for me.

So I'm currently on 75mg of Zoloft, and in a few weeks, I'll be bumping up to 100mg. I'm actually doing a lot better on this medication, but bumping it up may make things better. But if it makes things worse, I'll just go back down to 75mg.

On this medication, I can actually wake up without wanting to cry. And go to bed at night, without tears in my eyes. I can talk about my problems without getting over emotional and shutting everyone out. I feel more comfortable in my skin, and I feel more confident. I feel more rational, and I feel more stable. I no longer feel that I'm walking on egg shells around *myself*.

Are you my long lost twin?

Anyway, I've been on 75mg of Zoloft for about 1 1/2 yrs. I waited way too long to admit I was royally screwed up. Between being laid off, Cody dying the next day, dad dying, then home caring my mom, 2 surgeries and her death, I was beside myself. I called my doctor in hysterics and he rushed me right in. I love him. I can talk to him about anything and everything. I don't feel the same impact with the Zoloft as I did originally, but in addition with a short therapy session, I decided that I have no guilt, I will not be a doormat, I am strong and I will survive (thank you Gloria Gaynor! ;). It goes further than that, finances, my wrist etc, but I'm gonna be OK

[Maya & Inka's mommy]

I am on "Serlain". It works perfect for me!

In the past, nearly 10 years ago, I had a bad depression too; I took Prozac then. But it was way to strong for me, it made me hypernervous. I was prescribed Lexotan too then to calm me down. I was happy when I was strong enought to stop Prozac...!

Good luck to you, I know what a hard time you are going through right now...
http://users.pandora.be/bernardgabriels/images/smilies%20973%20Huge_hug.gif

[Pawsitive Thinking]

I am sorry to hear you aren't feeling so good - you are doing the right thing in going to see your doctor

I've been taking Prozac for a number of years and have had no problem with it apart from during the first two weeks when I felt a bit "out of it".

Hope you start to feel better soon

[smokey the elder]

I'm glad you're getting this checked out. More than many meds, depression meds work very differently for different people. "Your mileage may vary" in the extreme.

Good luck!

[Russian Blue]

People who don't have depression, don't understand that it's not as simple as "pulling yourself up by your bootstraps and getting over it". I only WISH it were that easy.



That is so true. My sister and I are total opposites. She thinks you can just think positive and that will get you through things. She doesn't see the chemical imbalance side that will throw your positive thinking out the window in 2 seconds! But I don't totally blame her....she has never had one depressive or negative thought in her life and can't even imagine such things.

My mother has suffered from severe panic attacks and depression since the age of 13. They had her on every major pill known to man and nothing seemed to work. Then, at the age of 60 she was placed on Paxil and it worked for her. Currently, she was able to go off Paxil and for the first time in her life she has 'freedom'. I'm not sure if it's her age or what happened but my mother finally has a normal life. I really feel sorry for her since her whole life was taken from her because of the panic and depression. She didn't have a career, would rarely leave the house and basically lived a sheltered life not of her choosing. Now she has the freedom she never had...all bittersweet at the same time.

I would totally recommend seeing a doctor to prescribe not only pills but therapy sessions as well. The pills can only go so far since you also have to learn techniques to control various emotions and situations. You don't want to depend on a drug alone since that drug is only one part of the cure.

[ashleycat]

I read on a depression group, having a boxing heavy bag helps. I need one. I'm looking into getting a freestanding one. For those rage moments.

I got mad at a bowl because it didnt want to come out of the cabinet because it was stuck to another bowl. I almost threw it.

I actually woke up early on my own this time. so maybe I will be adjusting to the early time again.

Being sleep deprived really does you in.

[catnapper]

Thanks so much for all your personal experiences guys!

I luckily don't have rage moments like Ashleycat where I want to toss things, but I DO get irritated a lot easier than I should. Then later I think WHY did that matter to me so much? Like yesterday, Ashley was using my flat board scratching post as a support to cut things out with an Xacto knife. I "yelled" at her (no loud voice, just condeming) for doing it on top of the fabric.... ummmmmm... if I stopped to think about it, the fabric is already shredded thanks to the cats sharpening their claws on it :o

I just want to be able to think clearly without flying to one extreme or the other, focus on things, and have my memory back. I am so scattered and don't pay attention to anything. I'm having a real hard time focusing on the computer monitor right now! My vision is swimming.... but I think thats because another migraine is brewing. I KNOW the migraines are stemming from the stress and anxiety I'm feeling. I feel like the world is closing in on me.

I think its funny..... I work with a woman who wasan absolute pleasure to work with until she went off Paxil a year and half ago. Then she because scattered, forgetful, arguementaive... everything I'm noticing in myself right now. How ironic if thats what the doctor puts me on! :p

[Cataholic]

I was on effexsor for a couple of years, and in conjuction with counseling, really found that it helped alot. I had no side effects. For me, the medication didn't erase any of my 'problems', but, it did make me feel like I was able to battle them without breaking down. I think I benefitted from the counseling, and am totally for having a professional to talk things over with. For me, I didn't think it was a mood disorder, but, rather situational depression.

I also think that having a positive outlook, in conjunction with a great support system, and a certain amount of "pulling yourself up by your bootstraps" CAN help. It doesn't solve anything, but, it is more productive than lying in bed all day long, even if that is what you feel like. There were times when I didn't want to leave the house, and my mom would say, "come on, we are going.....". And, I went. Did it make things great? Nope, but, they weren't worse, and, it did, for the moment, lessen the pain. In a way, I 'fought' the depression. On my own, and it failed. With help, things got better, over time.

[catnapper]

Update:
I saw the doctor this afternoon and now have a new prescription for an anti-anxiety drug that also works for depression and has a sedative to help me sleep (since I also can NOT get to sleep at night. I finally went to bed at 2AM last night)

I was prescribed Buspar. I'd never heard of it, and my doctor just smiled and said he knows nobody's ever heard of it. I can't take the first dose til tonight since I do't know how the sedative part will affect me. I'm actually looking forward to falling asleep BEFORE midnight. :p

If anyone knows anything about Buspar let me know. The doctor said its non-narcotic and very mild. Its just to take the edge off of all my stress and worry. I need it - my blood pressure was a million times higher today than it was just a few weeks ago when I saw him for a sinus infection. Anyway, he said its one of those drugs that you can take for any length of time, and when I feel my stressors are gone and I want to stop it, I just stop it. No weaning, no reducing amounts, etc.

On another note, I told the doctor that my left ear still feels funny (I had an ear infection and sinus infection last month) so he checked it out... and yes, I DO have an ear infection. But not the type I was expecting. I have SWIMMER'S EAR! :eek: Um... I haven't step foot in any body of water except my bath tub in the past year! Only I could end up with swimmer's ear from taking a shower! :rolleyes:

[Laura's Babies]

Yes, you can get swimmers ear for a shower or just washing your hair, that is why you are suppose to dry out your ears afterwards... Any water in the ear......

An old friend of mine had been reall ill off and on for several years. While in the hospital, the doctors put her on Buspar but she flat out refused to take it. She insisted she was not depressed when she was extreemly depressed and she NEVER slept, night or day which annoyed the staff terriably... Now I know why the doctor choose Buspar for her. She was terrified of sleeping and still is.....

[Maya & Inka's mommy]

Update:

If anyone knows anything about Buspar let me know.

I "googled" for you:
http://www.rxlist.com/cgi/generic/buspir.htm

http://www.mentalhealth.com/drug/p30-b03.html


http://www.drugs.com/buspar.html

http://www.healthyplace.com/medications/buspirone.asp

there is even a forum : http://www.topix.net/forum/drug/buspar

[K9karen]

Update:
I saw the doctor this afternoon and now have a new prescription for an anti-anxiety drug that also works for depression and has a sedative to help me sleep (since I also can NOT get to sleep at night. I finally went to bed at 2AM last night)

I was prescribed Buspar. I'd never heard of it, and my doctor just smiled and said he knows nobody's ever heard of it. I can't take the first dose til tonight since I do't know how the sedative part will affect me. I'm actually looking forward to falling asleep BEFORE midnight. :p

If anyone knows anything about Buspar let me know. The doctor said its non-narcotic and very mild. Its just to take the edge off of all my stress and worry. I need it - my blood pressure was a million times higher today than it was just a few weeks ago when I saw him for a sinus infection. Anyway, he said its one of those drugs that you can take for any length of time, and when I feel my stressors are gone and I want to stop it, I just stop it. No weaning, no reducing amounts, etc.

On another note, I told the doctor that my left ear still feels funny (I had an ear infection and sinus infection last month) so he checked it out... and yes, I DO have an ear infection. But not the type I was expecting. I have SWIMMER'S EAR! :eek: Um... I haven't step foot in any body of water except my bath tub in the past year! Only I could end up with swimmer's ear from taking a shower! :rolleyes:

Kim. the doctor put my mom on Buspar after my dad died. Mom rarely, if ever took any meds except for her thyroid. If I recall, it made her a lot more relaxed and a bit sleepy. She took it in the morning. For someone very sensitive to anything, I don't recall any serious or troubling side effect. Turned out she wasn't suffering from nerves, but Myasthenia Gravis, whose symptoms he didn't catch, and COPD so those conditions made her exhausted. So it was hard to tell if Buspar added to it. Good luck, my friend. Sleep well.

[catnapper]

Sleep well.
I had the strangest sleep last night! I fell asleep within an hour of taking it. I think I was actually asleep before my head hit the pillow. But its the feeling before that.... if I didn't know better, I'd swear I was high and drunk. Ooo... all the pretty colors. My tingly hands and feet. The world was swirling. Ahhh... ooooo... YUCK! I never understood why anyone would purposely seek out getting high or drunk. I hate the feeling.

Then, the problem I'm not so happy about is I woke up at 3:00 AM WIDE awake. I counted sheep, made up stories in my head, listed things, hunted down cats to pet (Flutter graciously accomodated my petting needs) and finally fell back asleep at 4:00. Then I was up again at 6:00. I had to get up each time to pee -- I never ever get up to pee once I'm asleep. Allen can sit on my full bladder and not wake me. Why on earth would I get up to pee now that I'm on this med? Coincidence?

I still feel drugged nearly 12 hours later. Maybe it'll get better as I get used to it? I'll see what happens tonight.

[mruffruff]

Or maybe a half dose?