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Danegirl2208
08-19-2006, 11:09 PM
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Source: Sid Burns

PAT BUCHANAN:
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.

DR. SEUSS:
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes!
The chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed,
I've not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.:
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA:
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

ARISTOTLE:
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX:
It was a historical inevitability.

SADDAM HUSSAIN:
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

RONALD REAGAN:
What chicken?

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK:
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER:
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

FREUD:
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES:
I have just released eChicken 98, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook - and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of the Chicken.

EINSTEIN:
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON:
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken please?

LOUIS FARRAKHAN:
The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.

THE BIBLE:
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken,"Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS:
I missed one?

Dorothy39
08-19-2006, 11:22 PM
Hey, I did receive that in my ""Outlook express" yesterday!!!! :D

I like this one:

Why did the chewing gum cross the road?

Because, it was stuck to the chickens' foot!!!

Laura's Babies
08-19-2006, 11:31 PM
Is this comedy night? I have laughed harder tonight at the postings than I ever have... RICHARDS newest Edster story and the Record Store Cats... NOW THIS!!

I LOVED them and the Colonel Sanders one was the icing on the cake!

Dorothy, the gum one was another good one...!!!

Dorothy39
08-19-2006, 11:35 PM
Where in the heck are these threads!!!! :confused:

I sooo want to laugh out loud tonight!!!

Okay, I'm goin in deeper laurasbabies!!!!

Danegirl2208
08-19-2006, 11:42 PM
Where in the heck are these threads!!!! :confused:

I sooo want to laugh out loud tonight!!!

Okay, I'm goin in deeper laurasbabies!!!!

heres the record store cats..they are SO HILARIOUS!!!
http://petoftheday.com/talk/showthread.php?t=110824

Dorothy39
08-19-2006, 11:48 PM
I found the cat shower story!!! :D Still laughing of course.

The hokey poky song did me in!!!!! I can still smell the tropical shampoo!!!!

That Richard is great, isn't he!!!

Catty1
08-19-2006, 11:56 PM
Why did the chicken cross the road?

To see a man lay bricks.


:rolleyes:

Dorothy39
08-20-2006, 12:02 AM
Okay, Olivia Newton John in the background sings, "Heart Attack" You're Giving me a Heart Attack!!! ( must have died and-- gone to heaven, what a way to goooooooo)

Thank-You!!!!! I survived!!! Those cats,the Stevie Wonder Cat :eek:

Help!! I might die laughing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!