Something isn't right...

[Samantha Puppy]

For the most part, all of my cats (two boys - Kirin and Sushi; two girls - Kimi and Maya) have all always gotten along. In the last few months though, I've noticed Kirin picking on Kimi with increasing frequency and increasing nastiness. It used to be an occasional swat, but lately it's gotten to the point where he chases her all over the house. When he catches her, he hurts her - usually biting what he can and "kicking" her. Her reactions have gone from a slight swat in return to full-on in-pain howling.

I don't know what changed between them. For the longest time, aside from the extremely rare swat or hiss, they ALL got along. Kirin gets along with Sushi and Maya just fine, as does Kimi. He just does not like Kimi at all.

I'm not sure what to do. Our current house (as well as our new house) is very open so it is impossible to separate them when I'm not around. Unfortunately, I'll be around even less in another few weeks as I will be returning to work full-time. Kimi's demeanor has changed drastically. She used to be very friendly, sweet and affectionate. Now she's stand-offish and skulky. I hate seeing her like this. And as horrid as this sounds, it's not like any of my cats are older and nearing the end of their existence here. Kirin and Sushi are almost two and the girls just turned one in February. They've all got loooooong lives ahead of them.

I don't want my sweet Kimi cat to be miserable for the rest of her life because of Kirin's weird vendetta against her. But what do I do? I've never had to deal with anything like this before. I don't want to give her up (I'd have Maya go with her - they've never been separated before), but I don't want to be selfish and keep her here if she'd be unhappy... which she clearly is now. I think her peeing in the kitchen may be attributed to this (medical reasoning has been ruled out).

So what do I do? I love my cats. I want to do what would make them all as happy as they deserve to be. Advice?

[Karen]

Hmm, has Kirin been to the vet? Everybody's neutered, right?

[catnapper]

Hmmm... did this behavior start when Aidan came? Perhaps a little de-stresser like Rescue Remedy in their water might do the trick

[DrKym]

was going to say the same thing ! a new baby new stresses rule out any med issues and as a wise man once said.....when the impossible is ruled out what ever is left no matter how improbable must be the truth, btw had the same issue yrs ago with 4 siamese after my daughter was of an age to interact it went away hope that helps

[shais_mom]

I was thinking of
--Rescue Remedy
--Feliway
--Contacting the pet psychic that several of have used.
Honestly - the Feliway will probably cost you MORE then the Psychic without guarenteed results.
If you are interested in talking to the Psychic - (and I know it sounds crazy but it WORKS) pm me and I'll email you her address.

[Samantha Puppy]

Everyone is fixed, yes.

And no, this started before Aidan and has only just exploded in frequency and intensity within the last few weeks.

[catmandu]

The Found Cats have thier little spats, but I can say that they ahve ever have a feud gainst one Cat.
I hope taht you can get them to being friends again, as it sounds as though that Kirwin is not having as good a quality life, with the Other Cat being so mean.
We are praying for peace.

[Samantha Puppy]

No more thoughts? Fixes? Interest?

[barncat]

I am sure you have tried to stop the fights... but something that sounds strange, but has worked for me...

Next time the agressive one attacks the victim, YOU go after the aggressor. Yowl and hiss. Corner him and clap your hands, grab his scruff and hold him flat while you growl. (Be firm and careful not to hurt, what you are doing is being the alpha of the colony and correcting the behavior as a t'ed off mother cat would) Let him go when it is clearly You deciding to. Go to the victim cat and groom her. For the next few days give them both love and grooming, but make sure the ex-victim is greeted first.

It doesn't always work the first time or if there is a big underlying issue, but it usually straightens out the problem.

Again, you have ruled out medical issues which should of course be checked first. Be careful and firm. Good luck.

[shais_mom]

do you keep a squirt bottle of water or canned air or a can of pennies/screws/bolts etc on hand?
Kloe knows when I pick up the squirt bottle she'd better back off from Kylie or she risks the wrath of Mom.
Canned air more $$ of course - just as a last resort if the water doesn't work.
Can of metal items not thrown at the offender just in the general direction. I tried this also for Keegan when she was a puppy to distract her from doing something she shouldn't.

[Samantha Puppy]

barncat, I have tried going after Kirin. It stops that particular attack but within another hour, he's after Kimi again.

shais mom, Kirin LOVES being sprayed with water. I tried adding vinegar to it, that didn't bother him either. A can with metal in it doesn't do anything but put the kabash on that particular attack, but like when I go after him as barncat suggested, he's back after her within an hour. To be honest, I haven't tried pressurized air, but I can't imagine that having any different affect than the water or going after Kirin.

I'm sorry if I sound whiny but I've been trying to fix this for the last couple months, once I started noticing the increasing frequency of the attacks. Couple that with issues with Samantha, the stress of house-hunting, and the pressure of getting your house ready to be put on the market, and a very sick baby, and I am at my wit's end. I've tried everything I possibly can, but I'm beginning to think that my sweet Kimi would be happier elsewhere. :(

[Laura's Babies]

When Samantha first came here, she had been here before Amy and Giz, only they didn't know it. To Samantha, they had invaded HER territory to she was trying to show her dominance or place in the house by attacking Amy every chance she had. Amy I felt was not able to defend herself and she sure couldn't take the stress of constantly being attacked. I tried all the things everyone else has suggested to you and like you, none of it worked. So then, I decided to try someting else.

Whenever she would attack Amy I would scold her, pick her up and put her in another room by herself and leave her in there with the door shut. I was consistant with it, EVERY time she attacked, she was put in a room by herself with the door shut... It only took 3 days for her to make the connection and the attacking came to a screetching halt.

Cats don't like being in a room with the door shut... they don't like being isolated and what does the Mama cat do when they act up.... she pushes them away, out of the litter, away from the rest. Try that... if you don't have a room, use a kennel but isolate the offender away from you and the rest of the household..

[Maya & Inka's mommy]

That sounds like great advize! I know my cats don't like to be isolated at all!

[Samantha Puppy]

That is good advice, but I am working 6 hours a day right now and will be returning to full-time work (with a longer commute) within the next few weeks. I won't be able to isolate Kirin after every attack because I'll only be home for a few hours in the evening and on weekends. As you said, consistency is the key but it isn't going to be possible for me with these work changes coming up.

[Samantha Puppy]

Not without screwing with their litter boxes, a change to which they all have demonstrated royally pisses them off and then we have kitties going to the bathroom NOT in the boxes.

I'm already nervous about the cats adjusting to the new house and that's still months away.

[shais_mom]

shais mom, Kirin LOVES being sprayed with water. I tried adding vinegar to it, that didn't bother him either. A can with metal in it doesn't do anything but put the kabash on that particular attack, but like when I go after him as barncat suggested, he's back after her within an hour. To be honest, I haven't tried pressurized air, but I can't imagine that having any different affect than the water or going after Kirin.

:(
well It was a good thought I suppose - I guess boy kitties don't show fear as much as girl kitties.

[Laura's Babies]

Maybe you could start with it on a Friday when you get home and spend the week end doing it? It only took Samantha 3 days to connect it in her head.... he may be smarter and have it connect sooner?

[Samantha Puppy]

Maybe you could start with it on a Friday when you get home and spend the week end doing it? It only took Samantha 3 days to connect it in her head.... he may be smarter and have it connect sooner?
I can try, or have my mom help me out if she's around. Our house MUST go on the market on Monday and we have an insane amount of things to do this weekend. :( So stressed.

[Logan]

I was going to suggest isolating the offender in a bedroom or spare room behind a locked screen door. I know that sounds silly and it may not be an option since you are putting your house on the market, but it does work. They can still see what is going on around them, but can't get out. Screen doors can be bought inexpensively, if you get a wooden one. I think screen doors or gates are much better ways of isolating a dog or cat (of course, gates don't work for cats) than closing doors.

I wish you luck. Wish I had more ideas for you.

Logan

[Samantha Puppy]

Yeah, can't do screen doors - don't think that'd show very well. I can do a bathroom but it wouldn't have a litter box in it. How long should I lock him away for?

Something's gotta be done - he has Kimi so upset that today she peed in the living room... on the carpet. Kitchen I can deal with - it's laminate. I cannot sell a house that has cat urine soaked into the pad underneath the carpet.

[Laura's Babies]

I would leave Samantha in there alone for 30 about minutes. When I first started, I would go open the door and she would be sleeping and not disturb her nap to come out.. That changed though to where she would just sit there and cry at the door the whole time wanting out.. When you get them at the door crying to come out... I think the point is getting to them.

For time out, they don't need a litter box, food or water or toys.. It should not be a holiday for them..(It's only 30 minutes!)

[Catty1]

Get that psychic info from Shais mom - I have read a number of stories here on how it helped everyone that tried it! And reasonable cost!

If you are really stressed - and who wouldn't be? - kitty could very well be picking up on that.

hugs
Catty1

[barncat]

Please do not take this as if I am criticizing you... Ypu clearly love your cats and are in a stressful situation and are trying very hard to find a solution... so this is NOT about making you wrong, but I know my guys react to my upsets by sometimes becoming upset too.

Given what you are all doing the house must be unsettled by the constant prep for showings and all the other stuff. This problem may go away when things settle down. It is possible the isolation will work this weekend...but if not you might want to try getting a large cage-type dog crate to put the aggressor in when you are at work. A small litter pan fits in there and since it is in the cage, it doesn't seem to make the others think there is a new free-pee spot.

Once you are in your new space everyone will be on new footing and when you are used to your job changes, things will be less stressful. I swear sometimes Ambrose decides that Bella or Captain are the cause of my upset and "punishes" them and keeps them away from me. (He has learned to stop if I say his name in a certain tone and cuddles instead.) Once when I cried out because my knee went out, Bella attacked Artemis just because Atremis was near me when it happened....

Be gentle with yourself through all these changes in your life. I very much hope that things settle down soon. Good luck.

[Soapets]

I don't have any new advice or suggestions. The isolation bit in a large dog crate sounds like it might work. I just want you to know I hope things work out, and you start feeling less stressed, and everything goes smoothly for you.

Deb

[dionne]

try SHAKING a can of pennies at him, i know NO cat who likes loud noises. and isolation could be a very good idea, as long as you're not like me and feel bad after2 minutes and let them out. if you DO have issues with him err...going on the bathroom floor, then get a little spare little box for him (which is also a good idea anyways, in case you have to isolate them due to sickness, etc.). i still think it could be baby. even if it happened BEFORE he was BORN, i know cats can "sense" when your pregnant, so that honestly could be it too. but yes, i do advise isolating him, until he quits, and shaking a can of pennies at him (plastic wal-mart or albertsons bags work just as well too).
good luck!
dionne