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RICHARD
05-08-2006, 07:23 PM
Lake Edward has officially opened for the season!

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Rules.

No swimming.
No fishing.
No boating.
No water sports of any kind.

---------------------------------

My work insisted on giving me a "scrub card".

Working in a hospital has it's advantages- they give you a credit card to get
some hospital scrubs- you go to vending machine (Like the ones that have the Toxic Egg Salad Sandwiches and the Milk WAAAAAAAAYYYYY past the expiration date-is that why they call it the Expiration Date? eat it and expire?)

I didn't want the card but found out that I could get a clean pair of pajamas a few times a week!!! ;)

I go to bed, stylishly attired and ready for any operation- I have thought about starting a GYN practice but have to find a match book cover to get the address for that school..... :eek: :rolleyes: :confused:


Last night I went to bed and the doggies began barking up a storm.

After a few whistles and shouts they still barked......So I got up and stepped into the main body of Lake Edward.

Of course I step into the dish so it flips up and hits me in the achille's tendon and I get a splash of cold water on my nifty scrubs....

I make it out side and the dogs call a retreat......

I then have to "hokey pokey" all the detritus my foot has collected while outdoors, Make sure the Edster doens't make the mad dash out the door when I open it (He did greet me there, "Dad, some IDIOT SPILLED MY WATER WHILE YOU WERE OUTSIDE-I DON'T HAVE THE NERVE TO TELL HIM WHO THE IDIOT IS.) make sure I wring out the water from the pant leg, Turn on all the lights to see how much the lake has over flowed, get the mop, mop, refill the bowl.

Too tired to get something else to put on I hung my wet leg over the side of the bed until I fell asleep......I awoke this morning with the Edster, sound asleep next to me, oblivious that the Official Lake Season Has Opened...

------------------------------

P.s. bring your own towels.

catmandu
05-08-2006, 07:26 PM
Richard,you HAVE to get your own Sitcom.
It already sounds a lot funnier than Joey.

Tubby & Peanut's Mom
05-08-2006, 08:32 PM
I then have to "hokey pokey" all the detritus my foot has collected while outdoors,

Like I say.....always keepin' your dad on his toes - good boy, Eddie! ;) :D

slick
05-08-2006, 09:58 PM
Guess you'd better put on your life jacket before going to bed. Make sure it coordinates with those cute jammies. :D :p ;)

rg_girlca
05-08-2006, 10:13 PM
LOL!!! Funny responses. :D

You paint quite a picture there RICHARD with your stories. :D

Laura's Babies
05-08-2006, 10:18 PM
I have a real stylish life jacket if you need to borrow it..... It is River worthy, never wore it in a lake!

Barbara
05-09-2006, 05:42 AM
I wonder who put poor Eddie's water bowl just in front of your bed :D :p Do you think it was Dudley the duck?

moosmom
05-09-2006, 11:43 AM
RICHARD,

I am sitting at work laughing so hard, my eyes are watering!! You definitely missed your calling in life as a stand-up comic. Thanks for the laugh.

Oh Eddie, I'm so proud of you for keeping dear 'ole Dad on his toes. Don't forget the sunscreen!!!! ;)

Donnaj4962
05-09-2006, 04:35 PM
I always enjoy your descriptions of your adventures with Ed!

Thanks for helping me to smile after a VERY rough day at work! :D

RICHARD
05-10-2006, 05:48 PM
LAUGH ALL YOU WANT... ;)

iT'S ONLY WATER!...

WHEN I OPEN MY PRACTICE I AM GONNA KEEP THE SPECULUMS IN THE FREEZER!

catfamily
05-10-2006, 06:11 PM
That had me laughing too :D You'd make a perfect comic just like the others say :)

sasvermont
05-11-2006, 07:28 AM
What a funny story. You have missed your calling dear Richard.

momoffuzzyfaces
05-11-2006, 04:23 PM
At least you didn't take your drawers off and sleep au natural!!! :eek: :D

RICHARD
06-08-2006, 03:24 AM
My invention?


A water bowl that has the sunlight charging bulbs around the rim...

You know.....Glows in the dark?


Score?
Edward 6
Me 0

------

I stumble across the floor, sleepwalking and think,

"I made it"


One step later?

I am frigging wet.

Killearn Kitties
06-08-2006, 05:02 AM
What a fantastic idea! If you missed your calling as a comedian, perhaps you could become an inventor?

Catty1
06-08-2006, 08:27 AM
You should jot down an outline and volunteer to do short bits at Humane Society and other events. You could really use your gift to raise funds for these folks!

catmandu
06-08-2006, 08:40 AM
That Would Be Great For Cats At Night, Especially My Cats Who Are A Little Hard Of Seeing.
Great Thought Richard.

Lobodeb
06-08-2006, 09:40 AM
You have a way with words. I can picture the event now. I'm sorry, but I'm laughing as I see it happening.

Frozen speculums? :eek:

RICHARD
06-10-2006, 02:38 AM
Latest score.

Dudley and Ed- 8
Me- NOTHING!

-----
If I could teach the Edster to go out on stage, on my shoulder, I could make a million.

P.S.
How the heck does that refridgerator raid work at three in the morning?
and who gets the first drink from the milk carton/jug? :eek:

RICHARD
07-18-2006, 11:07 PM
I have decided to become a hydrologist.....

Maybe that will keep my feet dry...

Score

Dudley and Ed 9
me 0

:rolleyes:

shais_mom
07-19-2006, 12:55 AM
lol

RICHARD
07-27-2006, 02:22 AM
Oh boy.....

The latest cooling trend around the "Lake"...


Ed swims in the lake....

He jockeys the bowl until the water spills, then-

Gets his paws and tail wet, jumps on the bed to cool off his dad-nothing wakes you up faster than wet paws.


Me - 0

Dudley and Ed....Winning!

RICHARD
08-06-2006, 05:06 AM
Seriously!

I found the Edster a nice water bowl.

I came home and wondered how things wouldn't be challenging if the bowl stayed in one place.

:confused:

RICHARD
08-16-2006, 09:21 PM
Lake Edward has claimed another victim .

Last week my brother stopped by.

As he walked into the house he happened upon Lake Edward.

He stepped into the shore and splashed water all over the floor.

His comment, "Aw @%^)#$(......EDDIE!"


I laughed and called out the lifeguards.... :D :eek: :p :)

RICHARD
08-31-2006, 12:38 AM
Rueters-Aug 30

Late last night Lake Edward claimed another victim.

The man, only identifed as "dad" hit the lake square in the middle. Water was seen pooling all over the floor, calling for the Lake Edward Water Resources
Agency to begin "mopping" up operations soon after the wave hit.

The spill was soon cleaned up and the lake was open again to the public.

This latest fatality comes right before the long Labor Day Weekend.

kimlovescats
08-31-2006, 11:13 AM
LOL! Poor Richard! ;)

RICHARD
09-06-2006, 02:09 PM
I think that Lake Edward finally got me.



I stepped into the water dish last week and didn't think anything about it.

In the last few days the pain in my foot was mild but, my heel has gotten progressively worse. It's probably not broken but it hurts like heck.... :confused: :eek: :rolleyes:


This thread ain't funny no more! :eek: