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View Full Version : I apologize if this doesn't belong here, I just need to vent.



Sevaede
04-25-2006, 11:52 PM
Father in law told hubby and I that he was going to SHOOT our cats! :mad: EXACT conversation (Who *wouldn't* remember something like this?):

*Troy and I walk in the kitchen. F.I.L. is at the table.*
F.I.L.: You know, I've got this twenty two (some sort of gun), it's real quiet. Next time the cats go outside, I'll shoot him. You'd never hear it and that would be the end. No more cat. *proceeds to laugh like it's the funniest thing in the whole world*
Troy: No, I don't think so. :mad:

Needless to say, Troy and I were livid.

He's the stupid mf'er that's LETTING them (Yes, actually ENCOURAGING) go out in the first place! We would be able to move out a lot sooner had we not had to spend $500+ in (emergency and semi) vet bills the past couple of months! Let me take the time out to explain that he completely and totally disregards cats, dogs, (etc) as anything more than anything but whining, eating, pieces of fur. He thinks that my taking the cats to get their shots is COMPLETELY stupid. He openly attacks my or any other ideal that considers them even a minute step above the primordial ooze that he slithered out of (oops, I apologize to all the snakes and worms of the world). He thinks, "A dog is a dog. One gets sick, you shoot em, and you get another one. They cost like, what, ten cents? They're JUST animals. It's not like they're human beings." WELL, buddy, most people do NOT have the same ideals as you. Further more, a lot of people, like myself, value the lives of our fur babies A LOT more than folks like YOU. I could go on but I probably shouldn't. There's so much... and ugh. I just don't know. Thanks so much for listening/reading! :)

Catty1
04-25-2006, 11:57 PM
At some point, you will be able to move - and I hope you can take all the critters with you!

Some people just don't get it...and it is sad...because FIL could get so much joy in his life from loving a pet; I somehow suspect he isn't a happy guy that much.

HUGS
Catty1

G535
04-25-2006, 11:59 PM
Apart from moving out (yes, I know it's easier said than done) all I can suggest is that you keep the cats in your part of the house and lock the door when you're not there. He sounds like a horrible person and I hope you can move soon! :)

icedtea
04-26-2006, 12:14 AM
what goes around comes around, matey. he will get what he deserves, being patient kills ya but it will happen.

*JTM*Coco*pi*Caramel*
04-26-2006, 12:19 AM
I find SOME older ppl especially men have this point of view. Like they think well if you must have an animal around, don't buy food for it, feed it scraps, and if it gets sick shoot it :confused: I don't get this but I hear it all the time. Where my Mom is from backyard cat shooting is a sport. I once saw a cat in a rabbit snare which is a trap and when the cat goes in a wire wraps around the part that set the trap off, a paw. So that cats paw is tightly wraped in wire and then it hangs there :( Anyways I was inside and heard this terrible crying and when I went out to see what it was I saw the neighbour stick the barrel of a 22 in the trap and he shot that cat. I am forever haunted by this and I was physically sick after. I don't know why ppl do things like this. Animals are living breathing things just as we are and have personalities and souls. How would FIL feel if every time he went out we shot at him? I don't think he would like that :eek: Good luck to you.

Sevaede
04-26-2006, 12:41 AM
At some point, you will be able to move - and I hope you can take all the critters with you!

Some people just don't get it...and it is sad...because FIL could get so much joy in his life from loving a pet; I somehow suspect he isn't a happy guy that much.

HUGS
Catty1

I am planning on asking him if I can take the older female and adopt her. If so, I plan on getting her vaccinated, spayed, flea medicine-d, get her on a heartworm preventative, etc. She is very much a lover and I have no doubt that she would be a great indoor cat as I suspect she was somebodys house kitty at one point. (He never adopted or bought any of them. They just wandered up at one point or another. She is VERY tame.)

He is the ONLY person I know that could walk in to a room and everybody hates him automatically. Yes, he does that with everybody. He is cold and rude with EVERYBODY. He would get a lot of joy if he loved his animals but, unfortunately for them, he doesn't.

Thank you. *hugs*

Sevaede
04-26-2006, 12:43 AM
Apart from moving out (yes, I know it's easier said than done) all I can suggest is that you keep the cats in your part of the house and lock the door when you're not there. He sounds like a horrible person and I hope you can move soon! :)

We are trying, trying, trying! :) We are almost to a moveable point so we are pretty jazzed up. We keep them locked up when we are not home so as to prevent any "accidents".

Sevaede
04-26-2006, 12:50 AM
what goes around comes around, matey. he will get what he deserves, being patient kills ya but it will happen.

Well then he will be getting a lot! Heh, I can be patient.

Sevaede
04-26-2006, 12:54 AM
I find SOME older ppl especially men have this point of view. Like they think well if you must have an animal around, don't buy food for it, feed it scraps, and if it gets sick shoot it :confused: I don't get this but I hear it all the time. Where my Mom is from backyard cat shooting is a sport. I once saw a cat in a rabbit snare which is a trap and when the cat goes in a wire wraps around the part that set the trap off, a paw. So that cats paw is tightly wraped in wire and then it hangs there :( Anyways I was inside and heard this terrible crying and when I went out to see what it was I saw the neighbour stick the barrel of a 22 in the trap and he shot that cat. I am forever haunted by this and I was physically sick after. I don't know why ppl do things like this. Animals are living breathing things just as we are and have personalities and souls. How would FIL feel if every time he went out we shot at him? I don't think he would like that :eek: Good luck to you.

I know. It's like these folks think that just because people got a slight jump on the food chain that they forget that they are "just animals" too. We are mammals, like cats and dogs and so forth. Besides, they aren't exactly the prime example of peoples anyways. Not exactly up to breed standard! ;)

Sonia59
04-26-2006, 03:30 AM
OMG, this guy believes he is better than animals, with such bad ideas in mind :eek: :eek: I don't understand -but of course there is nothing to understand - how some people can be so bad, just for free! :(

Hope he will do nothing bad,
Take care

moosmom
04-26-2006, 07:59 AM
Your FIL sounds like a real jerk. :mad: I'd tell him in no uncertain terms that if ANYTHING happens to ANY of your animals, you're going to the police and tell them what he threatened to do. You've got a witness so it's your word against his.

I also think Catty1 is right. He sounds like he's not a very happy person.

catmandu
04-26-2006, 09:43 AM
What a Jerk.
You should tell him what the Penalty is for Animal Cruelty where you are.
Or tell him that that will end any relationship and we will never ever see any Grand Children.
As Bugs Bunny said What a MAROOOOOOOON!!!!

Miss Z
04-26-2006, 10:16 AM
Oh dear, I can understand why you would be so upset. I would be at boiling point:mad: :mad: There is NO WAY he could shoot your cat, that's like you going and shooting one of your neighbour's kids, it's just NOT done.


He thinks, "A dog is a dog. One gets sick, you shoot em, and you get another one. They cost like, what, ten cents? They're JUST animals. It's not like they're human beings."

GRRRRRAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHH! Let me at him!!!!!:mad: I think I would have been close to hitting him if he said that to me! I hope everything turns out OK and your FIL doesn't attempt anything drastic.

Karen
04-26-2006, 10:19 AM
I moved this into the Dog House, where upsetting things belong.

What a sad, sad, ignorant man. Thank goodness your husband didn't inherit that attitude!

Lori Jordan
04-26-2006, 10:34 AM
I hear what you are saying .My stepdad was the same way i grew up on a farm,and there used to be cats tons of them and there was always kittens,well as a child i thought they should be in the house.But dad never agreed on that i find most Farmers have a bad attitude against animals in there eyes they only babied the cows (They made them money right)Not all are like that but a good majority are Now that he is older he has a total different attitude towards them as me and my sister have animals and they love them to death.Sometimes people need eye openers too see how precious these animals really are and how they bring so much love into our homes and THEY MAKE OUR HOMES HOLE!!!

king2005
04-26-2006, 11:35 AM
I hear what you are saying .My stepdad was the same way i grew up on a farm,and there used to be cats tons of them and there was always kittens,well as a child i thought they should be in the house.But dad never agreed on that i find most Farmers have a bad attitude against animals in there eyes they only babied the cows (They made them money right)Not all are like that but a good majority are Now that he is older he has a total different attitude towards them as me and my sister have animals and they love them to death.Sometimes people need eye openers too see how precious these animals really are and how they bring so much love into our homes and THEY MAKE OUR HOMES HOLE!!!

Stray cats always went to my friends farm. They would put a little kibble out for the cats & hope for the best. They wanted the cats to remain wild & live in the barn with the cows. But from time to time a friendly one would appear on the farm & it would be welcomed into the farm house for a little loving & then put back outside. None of the cats were fixed or had any shots. I wasn't angry at them, as they didn't have the money to deal with all the cats that people would dump at their farm (they lived in the middle of nowhere). So it was survival of the fittest cat & they did a great job at keeping the mice & rats away.

They had farm dogs too, but they didn't breed them thoughtlessly, they were wild dogs, that got daily loving from the farmer before he went into the barn. The dogs needed to be fairly wild as they had to keep wolves & theves away. Their top dog was an outdoor simi pet. She was breed as they needed more dogs (their very old dogs had passed on) & the wolves were back. She had 10 pups & all but a couple remained on the farm (friends wanted a pet, so they gave them a free puppy). Those pups were far less wild as they were born on the farm, but they kept the wolves away.

Its one thing to view the animal as a tool with respect, but as a replacable object is wrong. My farm friends would never have harmed one of their animals, but they did live by the rule, if the farmer couldn't bring the animal back to health (the sick animal would be brought into the house for care) & it was suffering, it would have been shot, cried over & then burried.

smokey the elder
04-26-2006, 03:15 PM
What a grade A, five star, galactic class, platinum-plated *$#@@!!! :mad:

Scooby4
04-26-2006, 03:30 PM
My cat recently got hurt. It's got one broken hip and a dislocated one. Don't know what happened. I panicked and drove to the nearest Emergency Vet clinic. The ONLY vet open for 150 miles! I called my father to ask him to help me cover the bill since I was unemployed. The vet clinic demands payment upfront or you don't get the cat back :mad: I knew the bill would be atleast $200. (It was $280 in the end). My father tells me that I should let the cat die AND that he would NOT lend me the money for a cat bill!!!! :mad:
It hurt my feelings. I then called another friend to help me. She then told me to let my cat die too!!! That the cat was just going to be "in pain" and that was cruel to the cat!!! :eek:
My cat broke it's hip years ago and I was told it would never jump again. She survived and jumps up on the bed which is over 3 feet off the ground! There was NO reason for me to put the cat to sleep. Even the vet did NOT mention it was that serious of an injury. It was marked down as "Fair" as it's condition!
I get soo mad when people tell you to put an animal to sleep at even the minorist of offenses or injuries. Who's to judge when to put an animal to sleep until that animal let's you know?

Daisy and Delilah
04-26-2006, 07:55 PM
People like your FIL make my blood boil!! :mad: Living around this jerk must be almost impossible for you. Unfortunately, as much as we would like not to believe it, the world is full of ignorant morons like this. They're everywhere. All I can ever think of in cases like this is, "What goes around comes around". One day, hopefully, something will happen to him that makes him have to suffer just like the animals he so strongly dislikes and punishes. I hope and pray that you and hubby can get away from him asap. No animal lover deserves to have to tolerate such torture. Best of luck to you in getting out soon :(

barncat
04-26-2006, 09:34 PM
Although I am a teacher, I grew up among farms (right next to the family farm and in the barn half the time). Cats were respected working members of the operation. The animals were usually tended by my mom, gram or me. (We didn't go to the doctor either unless it was life threatening.) So please be careful not to lump farmers and country people into one catagory...

Your father-in-law is a jerk. It is possible he says this stuff to get a reaction...something emotionally sadistic people often do... and would not actually do it. I had an uncle who used to say stuff like that. I used to remind him I knew way more about herbs than he did and if any of my animal friends went missing I might just make him something special... (I probably wouldn't have used anything lethal, but he wasn't sure and it did stop the comments.) Now my other uncles used to bring me orphaned bunnies (cutting hay is inevitably a problem) to raise and set free in the swamp where no one hunted.

I hope you get to move soon. Living in stress is awful.

carole
04-26-2006, 09:45 PM
Sadly there are many people in this world exactly like your FIL, he is not alone, to me these people are missing out on so much in their life, I think it would only take them to have an animal that showed so much love back to them to turn their minds around, but it does not always happen.

I don't think Lori Jordan meant any harm by what she said, i think what she may have been trying to say is that part of farming indeed can be cruel, i was raised on a farm so i know,but yes we should not tar everyone with the same brush, young or old, farmer or not,there are people in every race,creed,profession etc who share your FIL attitude,as sad as it is, we as animal lovers can only hope we can influence them and make sure that there are laws to protect animals and that they are abided by.

Good luck with adopting the other kitty, and i hope you can move out soon, as gosh it must be unbearable living under the same roof as him especially with his arrogance.,you both have my empathy.

sirrahved
04-27-2006, 09:38 PM
So sorry! People don't always realize what things are meaningful to others. I've admittedly made remarks that I thought were funny, only to think later "why in the world did I say that?" I pray your kitties are safe, and that you get to move very soon!

Sevaede
05-02-2006, 02:08 AM
Your FIL sounds like a real jerk. :mad: I'd tell him in no uncertain terms that if ANYTHING happens to ANY of your animals, you're going to the police and tell them what he threatened to do. You've got a witness so it's your word against his.

I also think Catty1 is right. He sounds like he's not a very happy person.

He is a humongous jerk. Oh, you can bet your booty that I've been itching to see if I could contact somebody about the conditions that he has his animals in, even. I mean, just WRETCHED conditions.

Sevaede
05-02-2006, 02:10 AM
What a Jerk.
You should tell him what the Penalty is for Animal Cruelty where you are.
Or tell him that that will end any relationship and we will never ever see any Grand Children.
As Bugs Bunny said What a MAROOOOOOOON!!!!

I wouldn't want him around any of my children (if we happen to have any) in any case. He's a creepy drunkard.

Sevaede
05-02-2006, 02:14 AM
Oh dear, I can understand why you would be so upset. I would be at boiling point:mad: :mad: There is NO WAY he could shoot your cat, that's like you going and shooting one of your neighbour's kids, it's just NOT done.



GRRRRRAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHH! Let me at him!!!!!:mad: I think I would have been close to hitting him if he said that to me! I hope everything turns out OK and your FIL doesn't attempt anything drastic.

I just can't even stand talking to him. I, generally, avoid being in the same room because of everything he does, says, etc. They don't call him Dick because his name is Richard. ;) (Somebody told me that they have never known anybody able to walk into a room and everyone hates them automatically. He is THAT dislikable of a person.)

Sevaede
05-02-2006, 02:16 AM
I moved this into the Dog House, where upsetting things belong.

What a sad, sad, ignorant man. Thank goodness your husband didn't inherit that attitude!

Ah, okay. :)

He is terribly ignorant and arrogant. You'd wonder how my quiet, darling, AWESOME husband ever sprung from such a neanderthal.

Sevaede
05-02-2006, 02:20 AM
I hear what you are saying .My stepdad was the same way i grew up on a farm,and there used to be cats tons of them and there was always kittens,well as a child i thought they should be in the house.But dad never agreed on that i find most Farmers have a bad attitude against animals in there eyes they only babied the cows (They made them money right)Not all are like that but a good majority are Now that he is older he has a total different attitude towards them as me and my sister have animals and they love them to death.Sometimes people need eye openers too see how precious these animals really are and how they bring so much love into our homes and THEY MAKE OUR HOMES HOLE!!!

Yeah, my dad was never really keen on animals up until he married my stepmother (awesome gal who brought in, originally, two doogs and two ferrety little monster faces). We had TONS of fish, crabs, and frogs. My brother had a lizard. My aunt moved in for a while and we even had a cat and a Rottie. You would never imagine how heartbroken he was when "his" German Sheppie girl or the sweet little Mimi ferret passed away.

Sevaede
05-02-2006, 02:23 AM
What a grade A, five star, galactic class, platinum-plated *$#@@!!! :mad:

My sentiments exactly. I couldn't have put it better myself.

Sevaede
05-02-2006, 02:28 AM
My cat recently got hurt. It's got one broken hip and a dislocated one. Don't know what happened. I panicked and drove to the nearest Emergency Vet clinic. The ONLY vet open for 150 miles! I called my father to ask him to help me cover the bill since I was unemployed. The vet clinic demands payment upfront or you don't get the cat back :mad: I knew the bill would be atleast $200. (It was $280 in the end). My father tells me that I should let the cat die AND that he would NOT lend me the money for a cat bill!!!! :mad:
It hurt my feelings. I then called another friend to help me. She then told me to let my cat die too!!! That the cat was just going to be "in pain" and that was cruel to the cat!!! :eek:
My cat broke it's hip years ago and I was told it would never jump again. She survived and jumps up on the bed which is over 3 feet off the ground! There was NO reason for me to put the cat to sleep. Even the vet did NOT mention it was that serious of an injury. It was marked down as "Fair" as it's condition!
I get soo mad when people tell you to put an animal to sleep at even the minorist of offenses or injuries. Who's to judge when to put an animal to sleep until that animal let's you know?

I am sorry. It infuriates me when people think that something that can be managed pretty well is still cause for death.


Who's to judge when to put an animal to sleep until that animal let's you know?

I agree. Well, there are certain circumstances (like those who hide debilitating diseases/conditions pretty well) but those are individual.

Sevaede
05-02-2006, 02:31 AM
People like your FIL make my blood boil!! :mad: Living around this jerk must be almost impossible for you. Unfortunately, as much as we would like not to believe it, the world is full of ignorant morons like this. They're everywhere. All I can ever think of in cases like this is, "What goes around comes around". One day, hopefully, something will happen to him that makes him have to suffer just like the animals he so strongly dislikes and punishes. I hope and pray that you and hubby can get away from him asap. No animal lover deserves to have to tolerate such torture. Best of luck to you in getting out soon :(

Hopefully, one day he will get what's coming to him. For having such disregard for living creatures is heinous.

He fails to realize that he is just a mammal, an ANIMAL, as well. Just because he walks on two legs doesn't mean he's better than anything else. Besides, it's not like he's primo example of peoples anyways.

Sevaede
05-02-2006, 02:41 AM
Although I am a teacher, I grew up among farms (right next to the family farm and in the barn half the time). Cats were respected working members of the operation. The animals were usually tended by my mom, gram or me. (We didn't go to the doctor either unless it was life threatening.) So please be careful not to lump farmers and country people into one catagory...

Your father-in-law is a jerk. It is possible he says this stuff to get a reaction...something emotionally sadistic people often do... and would not actually do it. I had an uncle who used to say stuff like that. I used to remind him I knew way more about herbs than he did and if any of my animal friends went missing I might just make him something special... (I probably wouldn't have used anything lethal, but he wasn't sure and it did stop the comments.) Now my other uncles used to bring me orphaned bunnies (cutting hay is inevitably a problem) to raise and set free in the swamp where no one hunted.

I hope you get to move soon. Living in stress is awful.

Heh, I grew up (mostly) in Pendleton, Oregon. They live, eat, and breathe farming. As well as the many towns (with populations under twenty) around them. My dad grew up on a farm where they raised pigs, horses, cows, chickens, and sheep. They probably showed them around the area, too. His sister and brother in law, until recently, raised sheep. But I don't think any of them have had any sort of ill will or disregard for other living creatures.

He went out and shot the orange male (who I believe fathered the most recent litter) because it was playing like cats do! He does say it to make us angry but I whole heartedly believe that he would go through with it, too. Thank you so much for raising those bunnies! :D

It is terrible but we are escaping ASAP. :D

Sevaede
05-02-2006, 02:45 AM
Sadly there are many people in this world exactly like your FIL, he is not alone, to me these people are missing out on so much in their life, I think it would only take them to have an animal that showed so much love back to them to turn their minds around, but it does not always happen.

I don't think Lori Jordan meant any harm by what she said, i think what she may have been trying to say is that part of farming indeed can be cruel, i was raised on a farm so i know,but yes we should not tar everyone with the same brush, young or old, farmer or not,there are people in every race,creed,profession etc who share your FIL attitude,as sad as it is, we as animal lovers can only hope we can influence them and make sure that there are laws to protect animals and that they are abided by.

Good luck with adopting the other kitty, and i hope you can move out soon, as gosh it must be unbearable living under the same roof as him especially with his arrogance.,you both have my empathy.

Um, I wasn't the one who quoted and posted about the friends and the barn cats. That was king2005. I don't think they meant any harm, though. :)

Thank you.

Laura's Babies
05-06-2006, 12:17 PM
God has a most strange sense of humor and I think people with attitudes like that, God sends them back as the animals they detested and were mean to....

That OR someday he will be old and helpless and someone will mistreat him. You DON'T get away with stuff like that! God makes sure you get what you give in life!

Catty1
05-06-2006, 06:14 PM
Here is a wacky idea...someone who posted here said your FIL might be doing it for the attention(sorry, forgot the name).

Treat him like a teenager who acts bad to get attention. Just say, "Oh," and carry on whatever you are doing.

It's the only attention he can get...I am willing to bet that when he doesn't get attention(even bad attention is better than none, and he feels he has WON when you react), he will eventually stop.

Just a thought.

hugs
Catty1

Sevaede
05-07-2006, 12:18 AM
God has a most strange sense of humor and I think people with attitudes like that, God sends them back as the animals they detested and were mean to....

That OR someday he will be old and helpless and someone will mistreat him. You DON'T get away with stuff like that! God makes sure you get what you give in life!

Sounds good to me!

Sevaede
05-07-2006, 12:19 AM
Here is a wacky idea...someone who posted here said your FIL might be doing it for the attention(sorry, forgot the name).

Treat him like a teenager who acts bad to get attention. Just say, "Oh," and carry on whatever you are doing.

It's the only attention he can get...I am willing to bet that when he doesn't get attention(even bad attention is better than none, and he feels he has WON when you react), he will eventually stop.

Just a thought.

hugs
Catty1

I'll give it a try. Usually, I just raise my eyebrows and walk away.

hugs

Catty1
05-07-2006, 09:44 AM
Also...the squirt bottle works for cats, so...naaah....never mind.... ;)

carole
05-07-2006, 04:16 PM
Ah i love the idea of these people coming back in to a life run by animals, wouldn't that be great, they could be left out in cold, with empty bellies,and sick and cold, just desserts, i wish that upon my neighbour everyday,who neglected her kitties and still does,but who are happily residing at the cats backpackers at my place.

Let us hope that your FIL gets a wake up call and realises just how much love a sweet furbaby can actually offer him, especially in his mature years.

shihtzulover850
05-12-2006, 11:36 AM
Why don't people get it

kitimom
05-13-2006, 12:34 AM
My FIL used to be the same way and yeah, we lived with him for a while too.
He was a drunk, loud, seething lowlife and NO ONE liked him. He NEVER held a job while we were there. He lived with his alzhiemers -patient MOTHER in HER house and ran it like his own. He would SCREAM at her (his mom) on a daily basis and cuss her out about everything. He would taker her check and pay SOME of the bills with it but drank up the rest on his Booze. He made me get up every morning and fix an elaborate breakfast for everyone and then clean the kitchen before I went to work. I HATED getting off work, cuz I knew I would have to be around him when I got home. My husband and I would lock our bedroom door at night so he wouldn't just barge in and start telling his old huntin stories at the top of his lungs. He Demanded that we pay rent while we were there so he would have more booze money. He stood and spied on us while we were in our room one time and barged right in on us while we were in a "compromising" position. When we were about to move (like 3 days before--and no we did not tell anyone we were moving) he barges in our room and demands the money for the gas bill. That was 75 dollars that we were gunna need when we moved. When he came to visit us in our first apartment, he did not knock on the door, he just barged right in. I looked at my husband and he asked him to step outside and then he asked him to knock first before coming in like that. He was told that under any surcomstances that alcoholwould not be tolerated and that if he wanted to drink he would have to do it in his car in the parking lot.
When you move, do it and do it fast...ONE TRIP!!! If you have to leave a few things behind, do so and try to get them later.
If ya'll have kids, DO NOT LET HIM AROUND THEM!!!! He may try to say he has rights to see them, but let me tell ya, you DO NOT want your children exsposed to his kind.Abuse is abuse and he is an abuser.
My FIL nowdays is sober (Thank God) and he has "mellowed out" alot (according to my SIL) but I still HATE him and will till the day I die and then some!!! I will never forgive him for the S*** he put me and hubby thru. His mama died and they sold the house, he and my MIL live in welfare housing and he (get this!!) draws a socail security check every month. He calls it his retirment. (WHATEVER!!!)
So, yeah, Wenis, I understand what you are going thru. I wish ya'll lived here in Tennesseee so we could talk and maybe get together to B**** about our out-laws . I WILL keep ya in my prayers!!