It's a sad day for our family

[4theloveofzoe]

We had a family meeting, and our family has decided that Zoe isn't right for our family, and we aren't the right family for her. :( I have tried hard to work things out for her best interests and ours. But after so many weeks of trying and trying... We, as a family, have come to the conclusion that Zoe is much better off with another family. One that doesn't have young children.

First off, let me tell you the reaons why we feel this isn't going to work anymore. :(

Zoe continues to have behavioral problems. Soiling in the house. (Although she has gotten better.) She bites and playfully attacks my 10 year old daughters, when Zoe was meant as a companion animal for my 10 year old, Marissa who has disabilities.

When the younger girls try to take her for a walk, she pulls hard. So they refuse to walk her. ANd has PULLED me hard enough to cause damage to my already injured arm (carpal tunnel syndrome).

She dug HUGE holes in our yard, that made us got a warning from our landlord, that our lease was going to be cancelled. Which would cause us to become homeless and have no where to go.

I just think that we made a mistake about adopting a medium sized dog. I hope that you all will understand our decision and will support me, because I'm feeling pretty sad and depressed right now.

I emailed the animal shelter that we got her from, and am waiting to hear about returning her. I tried calling before and no one returned my phone calls. :rolleyes: Anyways... We just don't think it's fair to her to be cooped up all the time, because everyone's afraid to walk her because she pulls so hard.

I've tried training her since we got her, and nothing has worked with her. She needs a professional, and where we live there are no professionals.

We are looking at adopting a 10 month old small breed dog. He's already trained, and won't be a problem as far as walking him, etc.

If we decide to adopt him, I will return here.

[lute]

i'm so sorry that Zoe isn't working out for you. hopefully the shelter can find her the perfect home for her. good luck with this new dog.

[Kfamr]

It seems you are pretty set in your ways - but have you seeked a professional behaviorist/trainer yet? All of the problems you are having CAN be solved with training. You may have tried but, not all people have a knack for training, and not all dogs can be trained the same. A behaviorist/trainer is able to "read" the dog and figure out what they need to be a sound dog. Zoe being younger, she should be able to do perfectly fine.

Maybe if not your family, someone else will be able to take her to a behaviorist. :)


*edit* I skipped the line where you said you can't find a professional. No PetsMarts, Petcos even? Where is your exact location? I can look around on my different training/dog forums for you.

[Alysser]

I'm sorry Zoe isn't working for you. :(

[CagneyDog]

I'm sorry that it's not working out. I know that you want the best for both your family, and Zoe, however I'd really reccomend doing more training with her. These are all issues that can be solved!
Whatever your decision is, I wish you luck :)

[poofy]

Good luck to all of you..and hope the best for all to :)

[*iluvskipper*]

thats sad. but i'm sure that u'll both be happier!

[Crazy-Cat-Lover]

Good luck, I wish your family the best, no matter what happens. :D

[luvofallhorses]

:(

[Jessika]

Giving up a pet for its best interest is never easy.

However, the problems you listed are all solvable with training, time, and patience.

If you are not willing to put the time forth to fix the problems then perhaps it IS best to find a new home.

In either case, I wish both of you the best of luck in whatever decision you think is best for your family

[cyber-sibes]

That is sad, even though you've only had her a short time, I'm sure your kids especially have gotten attached to her. Hopefully you will find a dog that is compatible, and Zoe will find a good home, too. Sounds like a good decision, all things considered.

[finn's mom]

I wondered how you all were fairing. I'm sorry to hear that your choice was the wrong one...I hope that you'll still consider taking your new pet to a training class once a week...even an hour drive isn't hard once a week. No matter how small a dog is, behaviors can still be problematic if not addressed as the dog matures. Even if the puppy's already received training, it's still a good idea to continue with it. Consistency is key. I think it's smarter to get a smaller dog, and, I wish you and Zoe the best of luck in finding the right family members.

[Vela]

Well, even a small dog will have behavioral problems if time isn't spent training and reinforcing the trained behaviors and working on them every day. Not to mention small dogs are just as apt to be nippers, if not more so, than larger dogs. I hope Zoe finds a good home but you will still need to persist with training any dog you get.

[Vette]

Awwwwwwww

*huggies*

[wolf_Q]

First off, please note that I am not in any way trying to bash you or your decision. You seemed genuinely concerned for Zoe and your family. I'm just trying to maybe help you see some things that could be helped...



Zoe continues to have behavioral problems. Soiling in the house. (Although she has gotten better.) She bites and playfully attacks my 10 year old daughters, when Zoe was meant as a companion animal for my 10 year old, Marissa who has disabilities.

How old is she? This sounds like normal puppy/adolescent behavior to me. Dogs play with their mouths; they have to be taught that this is not acceptable behavior. What do you do when she playfully bites somebody?



When the younger girls try to take her for a walk, she pulls hard. So they refuse to walk her. ANd has PULLED me hard enough to cause damage to my already injured arm (carpal tunnel syndrome).

I know (having a husky, a known puller) that teaching a dog to walk nicely on a leash is not easy. I also know some people on here do not agree with using these, but I think it could be worth a try.....have you thought about a halti or a prong collar? Though I rarely use them, I have tried both and both helped *significantly* with the pulling.



She dug HUGE holes in our yard, that made us got a warning from our landlord, that our lease was going to be cancelled. Which would cause us to become homeless and have no where to go.

Do you leave her outside unsupervised for long periods of time? Dogs usually dig because they are bored...I would think if she was only outside long enough to go potty or if somebody was out there playing with her and watching there wouldn't be a problem. I've also heard of getting a kiddie pool filled with dirt and teaching the dog to dig there instead of the yard (haven't tried it, my dogs don't dig).



I just think that we made a mistake about adopting a medium sized dog.

I personally don't think the size is the issue. It's her age and lack of training. The only issue that I think size could matter is walking on a leash...but let me tell you, my 17 lb schnauzer can pull harder than my 60 lb siberian husky...



I emailed the animal shelter that we got her from, and am waiting to hear about returning her. I tried calling before and no one returned my phone calls. :rolleyes: Anyways... We just don't think it's fair to her to be cooped up all the time, because everyone's afraid to walk her because she pulls so hard.

I hope the shelter is not a kill shelter? Black dogs are usually the hardest to adopt out. If you are insistent on finding her a new home maybe you could try contacting some local rescue groups instead.



I've tried training her since we got her, and nothing has worked with her. She needs a professional, and where we live there are no professionals.

Have you contacted all of the local vets, pet stores, etc? There may be one that you just are not aware of.



We are looking at adopting a 10 month old small breed dog. He's already trained, and won't be a problem as far as walking him, etc.


I hope you know that training is a lifetime thing. You have to continue to work with the dog throughout its life to continue the training and good behaviors. Small dogs can have the same behavior problems that large dogs can have.

Whatever you decide to do, I wish you, your family, and Zoe the best of luck.

[jesse_3]

I am so sorry that your decision on adopting Zoe was not the right one. I wish you all the best of luck, and I hope that everything works out!

Steph and Jes

[Pembroke_Corgi]

It seems you are pretty set in your ways - but have you seeked a professional behaviorist/trainer yet? All of the problems you are having CAN be solved with training. You may have tried but, not all people have a knack for training, and not all dogs can be trained the same. A behaviorist/trainer is able to "read" the dog and figure out what they need to be a sound dog. Zoe being younger, she should be able to do perfectly fine.

Maybe if not your family, someone else will be able to take her to a behaviorist. :)

I agree that Zoe's problems could be fixed with training- many dogs have the same problems you described without good training. There must be someone to help with your situation? From what I've read, it sounds like Zoe has a lot of energy that isn't being dealt with, so she becomes a problem by being destructive. If you do decide to get a different dog, maybe an older dog would be a better choice- puppies have endless energy, and if you are unequipped to handle it then more problems could arise with your new dog.

I wish you luck in whatever you decide.

[finn's mom]

Not to say that she's not receiving well-intentioned, good advice, because she is...but, just my opinion...this appears to be a dead horse. At least as far as Zoe's future is concerned, it looks like a made decision. The most we can do at this point without causing more hurt is to give sound advice about the new dog once it's home. I personally don't think a dog is a good idea for the household at all, but, hopefully, this time around will be handled better.

I still wish the best of luck to the family in their search and to Zoe in hers.

I just had to put my two cents.

[mustlovedogs]

:(

I agree. :(

[zoomer]

I'm sorry Zoe isn't the right dog for your family. I support you 100% and I can understand everything you're saying. The same is going on with Buddy, except we're not sure if we are going to get rid of him or not. Good luck finding a new pup!

[Catty1]

Hi.

I don't know what your daughter's disability is - but if she is limited in her movement, then a frisky or lively dog will not make a good companion. A dog like that will want to be running off and playing! And high energy dogs WILL get bored easily and start digging up the yard.

An older dog might be best as some have said.

Prior to Zoe - had you owned dogs before? Just wondering.

Getting an animal for a particular purpose - companionship - means you have to do some research on what kind of animal would be suitable, and what their care needs are.

You may want an animal to help look after your daughter - but the animal needs appropriate looking after as well.

heck - a guinea pig would sit in her lap and be quite cute! Think of other pets too.

good luck
Catty1

[Vela]

I personally don't think a dog is a good idea for the household at all, but, hopefully, this time around will be handled better.

I still wish the best of luck to the family in their search and to Zoe in hers.



I agree. Also I was wondering if the shelter is a no kill shelter?? The reason I ask is because if you return her to a kill shelter due to "problems" chances are she will be put down when in reality those problems could be fixed with proper training. If it's a no kill shelter than she should be safe because her "problems" arean't actually problems at all, rather a lack of proper training, so they will work with her. Kill shelters most of the time won't work with a dog that is returned for behavioral problems because they tend to be considered less adoptable and are often on the top of the kill list. A smaller pet of sorts might be the best option for your family at this time. But that's just my opinion.

[4theloveofzoe]

May I ask why you think that a dog isn't good for our household? You don't know us.

I'm simply stating that we don't have a trainer nearby . I don't have a vehicle to get her where she needs to go to get trained.

I was asking for support not to be bashed that our household doesn't need a dog. :(

[4theloveofzoe]

By the way... for those of you that posted with compassion, I just wanted to let you know that my best friend, Andrea, who has OLDER children (14 and up) is coming to adopt her today. They have a house out in the country where she can run free, and act like a lab should be able to act, not be cooped up in our apartment.

SO we'll still get to come and see her whenever we want.

[4theloveofzoe]

PS... Don't look for me to return here. Too many judgemental people. :( :( :( :( :(

[4theloveofzoe]

:(
Hi.

I don't know what your daughter's disability is - but if she is limited in her movement, then a frisky or lively dog will not make a good companion. A dog like that will want to be running off and playing! And high energy dogs WILL get bored easily and start digging up the yard.

An older dog might be best as some have said.

Prior to Zoe - had you owned dogs before? Just wondering.

Getting an animal for a particular purpose - companionship - means you have to do some research on what kind of animal would be suitable, and what their care needs are.

You may want an animal to help look after your daughter - but the animal needs appropriate looking after as well.

heck - a guinea pig would sit in her lap and be quite cute! Think of other pets too.

good luck
Catty1

I don't want an animal to "look" after my daughter... I wanted a COMPANION animal. A calm, not hyper dog. My daughter is not physically handicapped but mentally. She's CD, ODD, and ADD.

It just gets to me, how when I say that I'm giving up my dog, that I get attacked and judged. I'm doing it for HER own good too you know... God people... You don't know me... :confused: :( :(

[Catty1]

That's why I asked, hon - I didn't know much about the situation.

So glad Zoe will have room to romp!

Labs and Retrievers are energetic and great grinning dogs - they're puppies til they're 15!

Not knowing if you had had dogs before, I just wondered if another type of animal would be suitable as well.

My sister has end-stage MS, and has been wheelchair bound for years, so I wondered if the disability was physical or otherwise. That's all.

hugs
Catty1

[zoomer]

PS... Don't look for me to return here. Too many judgemental people. :( :( :( :( :(

I'm sorry you feel that way :(

[4theloveofzoe]

It was nice meeting some of you.

Take care!!!!!

[zoomer]

Please don't leave! :( Stay and get to know some people :) I know we didn't give you such a great welcome, but once you get to know everyone you might really like it here :)

[finn's mom]

I'm sorry that you didn't get the reception you were looking for. I, personally, said that a dog (at least a puppy anyway) might not be the best idea for the household because it seems that training isn't something you're knowledgeable on, and, you've said there are no trainers to help you learn...that's the only reason I said that at all. And, a trained 10-month-old puppy is still going to need more training. I have been compassionate, but, realistic, and, not trying to bash you at all. If you saw my posts that way, it's unfortunate. But, honestly, I can understand why you don't want to come back. I wish you the best of luck.

[Almita]

You shouldn't leave they are just stating things that can probably work. I was reading and noone seemed judgemental. Sorry about that though. I'm glad your friend is going to adopt Zoe and you will still be able to see Zoe.

[4theloveofzoe]

*sighs*

Okay... I've just called Petco, they do have a good trainer there, according to the person who answered the phone. It's $69.95 for 6 weeks. There is a Petco 48 miles from here. I am going to contact a friend to see if she can run us up there once a week. And another friend who lives about 22 miles from us to take us up there, when my other friend can't. Hopefully I'll be able to find another vehicle soon.

I called my best friend and told her the situation... She agrees that I should give Zoe this last shot. If the training doesn't work, then she agrees to take her.

The lady at Petco said that she recommends basic training. Which is what we'll start out with. Then we'll deal with the other problem issues.

*cross your fingers and hope that this works*

WHY is it so hard for me to want to give her up?

[Alysser]

My paws are crossed! :D

[k9krazee]

I'm glad you've decided to give her another shot!

I really believe that she's just not getting the exercise that she needs, I have a yound Lab mix and he is absolutely CRAZY and destructive if he doesn't get a 2 mile bike ride a day, lol. Do you have a bike? You can get a Springer (or something similar) to attach to the bike and that would wear her out very quickly with no pulling while you try to walk her!

I hope the training goes well, and its nice to know that there is a family that will take her if it doesn't work out. I am SO glad that she won't be going back to the pound! (((Hugs)))

[4theloveofzoe]

I'm glad you've decided to give her another shot!

I really believe that she's just not getting the exercise that she needs, I have a yound Lab mix and he is absolutely CRAZY and destructive if he doesn't get a 2 mile bike ride a day, lol. Do you have a bike? You can get a Springer (or something similar) to attach to the bike and that would wear her out very quickly with no pulling while you try to walk her!

I hope the training goes well, and its nice to know that there is a family that will take her if it doesn't work out. I am SO glad that she won't be going back to the pound! (((Hugs)))

The animal shelter that I got her from is a no kill shelter, but still... The thought of her going back there.. :(

You know... WHY is it that animals especially dogs, cats, birds, etc touch our hearts so much? Even when they're naughtY

[Kfamr]

I'm so glad you are giving her a second chance! She deserves it, afterall, I do believe a majority of "problem" dogs CAN be perfectly sound companion animals if trained properly.

I apologize, and sincerely hope that my post didn't offend you. I certainly wasn't intended for it to sound like I was judging you, just offering advice and what I would do in a situation like your's.


I hope everythings works out the best for you, your kids, and especially Zoe. Will you be taking your children to classes with you? I'm wondering if that will help Zoe to respect them more as the alphas?


It is hard for you to give her up because you're human. Most humans have hearts and certainly you do. :)

[finn's mom]

It sounds like she'll be fine, either way. ;) Glad you are taking this extra step, I know it's a lot of work, but, it may be just what you guys need to make this last effort! Good luck, and, the only advice I have is stay consistent! Work with her a lot!

[chocolatepuppy]

Training a puppy into a good dog can be a lot of work. It can also be a lot of fun.Consistency,as others have mentioned, is important. Dogs want to learn, you just have to keep working with them. I hope things work out for Zoe and your family. :)

[4theloveofzoe]

I am hoping to take the kids with me to her training. Especially the twins who are 10, because she doesn't respect their authority at all. It's funny... because she's SOOOO gentle with Isabel, whose 2.

[luvofallhorses]

Training a puppy into a good dog can be a lot of work. It can also be a lot of fun.Consistency,as others have mentioned, is important. Dogs want to learn, you just have to keep working with them. I hope things work out for Zoe and your family. :)

ditto.

[K9soul]

Lori, I sent you a private message :). I just thought I'd mention it here in case you don't usually check them. I think the classes will be a wonderful experience for all involved :)

[4theloveofzoe]

My older children are primarily the ones who wanted to trade her in for a smaller dog. Now how do I get them to cooperate in Zoe's NEW lifestyle?

[4theloveofzoe]

Lori, I sent you a private message :). I just thought I'd mention it here in case you don't usually check them. I think the classes will be a wonderful experience for all involved :)

I think you may be right.

[BOBS DAD]

I know this has been a very difficult decision for you and we don't want it to be any harder. It is always easy to tell others what they should be doing, but it is alot harder to actually do them. We don't really know how much trouble (or not) Zoe has been and we really can't judge. Of course, we hope that it all works out for Zoe because sometimes just a change in environment can make all the difference. (Zoe looks a little like a Beagle/mix) and Beagles love to roam and would probaby be happier in a country setting with someone who can take her out - off leash for walks and let her chase critters.

I see that your daughter has disabilities and you are hoping for a calmer companion. I hope this works out for you!!!

I hope the very best for Zoe and your new dog. But do please keep in mind that all dogs can be problematic and you may want to consider a full grown dog that is housetrained, sweet, etc.. Sometimes folks have to find new homes for these sweet ones as well when a family member dies, moves or simply cannot care for them anymore. Think about it! Good luck!!! :D

[Jessika]

*sighs*

Okay... I've just called Petco, they do have a good trainer there, according to the person who answered the phone. It's $69.95 for 6 weeks. There is a Petco 48 miles from here. I am going to contact a friend to see if she can run us up there once a week. And another friend who lives about 22 miles from us to take us up there, when my other friend can't. Hopefully I'll be able to find another vehicle soon.

I called my best friend and told her the situation... She agrees that I should give Zoe this last shot. If the training doesn't work, then she agrees to take her.

The lady at Petco said that she recommends basic training. Which is what we'll start out with. Then we'll deal with the other problem issues.

*cross your fingers and hope that this works*

WHY is it so hard for me to want to give her up?


WOW only $69.95 there?? The PetCo I worked at charged $89.95. Sometimes they would go on sale with the PALS card though.

In any case I am SO SO SO glad that you have decided to reconsider and are trying to get her training. I can assure you that this will work out for BOTH of you!

[BOBS DAD]

I did not read all the later posts and it seems as if you are going to give Zoe some more time and try some classes. Good 4 you. I hope this all helps and that things work out!!!! :D

[Kfamr]

I for one think you are doing the right thing. I think most of the people on here are speaking to quickly. A young lab just isn't right for your family. She'd be better off in a new home with lots of room to roam. A lot of those who posted are young though, the age to be able to chat on this forum is 13. You'll find a lot of the younger people on here have big hearts, but don't always act out of what's best. Yes she can be worked with through training, but it won't mean she will become the perfect dog for your needs. She is acting like a normal young lab, and you can't tell a dog not to act normal. I hope you find a good dog and I hope you stick around even if you don't get a new dog right away.



I went back and read every single post over again... I can't see where any of the younger members (or anyone else for that matter) said anything other than support and suggestions?? I'm rather confused as to what anyone's age in this thread has to do with ANYTHING at all. :confused:

[K9karen]

Good Luck with Zoe's training! I pray things work out for you. I thought, when I got my first dog, Cody, a yellow lab/golden retreiver mix, at age 40, that it would be a cinch to gain authority and train him myself! Duh. He was a maniac until I enrolled him in training and on graduation day, the trainer remarked that in all her years of training, Cody made the most progress of any dog she's met! And best of all, Cody really enjoyed it after a while. I think making it a family affair is a wonderful and fun idea! Whatever happens, whatever the outcome, may Zoe be blessed with a happy and healthy life.

[chocolatepuppy]

A lot of those who posted are young though, the age to be able to chat on this forum is 13.

uh, you need to check back through the people who posted, and check their ages. ;) I agree with Kay, what does age have to do with knowing how to train a dog :confused:

[Pembroke_Corgi]

I hope I didn't come across as being judgemental, if I did it wasn't my intent and I'm sorry. I'm glad that you are going to give Zoe another chance, though. I think that working with her in a class is going to make a big difference in her behavior. Also, some of her energy will certainly get less as she gets older. One of my dogs, Adele, was a very hyper puppy and we had some problems with her being desructive. Even after walks, and playing constantly with my other dog she would find time to dig holes and chew. But, I noticed a big change in her behavior about the time she turned 1 1/2, and this summer she will be 3, and is more like a "normal" dog, she just needed some extra exercise with all the energy! Anyway, I didn't mean to ramble- just wanted to wish you good luck with the classes! :p